♡O.T.P.♡

YoonMin

O K ay

The last YoonMin wasn't exactly um

Rated PG

This one will be similar to the JiKook one I guess, I'll try to make it funny 😂

Warnings: Slight Vessi (🌚)

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Thick

"Jimin, has anyone ever told you you're thick?" Yoongi, a genius, asks.

Jimin eyes him with flaming eyes. "The next time you say that damn word and address it to me, I'll burn your penis off and feed it to Min Holly."

Yoongi looks (slightly) offended (although it barely even shows at all) and leans back with a hand on his chest, his mouth ajar. "You wouldn't dare, you small demon."

"Oh, but I would. Where's Min Holly?"

"NOT MY BABY!"

"I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR BABY!"

"NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE YOU AREN'T. YOU BEAST."

"BITCH."

"ASS."

"KEEP YOUR SHIT IN YOUR POCKET, YOONGI."

"THEN KEEP YOURS IN YOUR MOUTH."

"I'LL BREAK UP WITH YOU."

Yoongi falls off the couch in a split second, lands on his chest, rolls towards Jimin's feet at high speed, wraps his arms around the younger's ankles, then pleads, "no!!! Jiminnn!!! I love you!!!"

Jimin scoffs and watches his pathetic (but really cute) boyfriend whining. "Then keep your shit in your pocket."

Yoongi pouts and makes a whining puppy sound which oddly reminded him of Hoseok. "Okay..."

"Now stand up and give me a kiss."

Yoongi smiles but kneels down on one knee instead of standing up. He takes Jimin's left hand and places a chaste kiss on the top. "Park Jimin, you're the most charming man I've ever met. I love how you're not only my lover, but my best friend. Let's stay this way forever. I love you."

Jimin tears up. "You stupid ass. You're so strange. One day you act like your typical cold self; all quiet and frowny, and then the next you're drowning me with love and cheesy words." Jimin kneels down with Yoongi and wraps his muscle arms around the latter. "But I love you too. Even if you do call me thick and tend to peeve me off."

"Don't deny the truth. You're hella thick."

"And don't push it. You're hella making me want to burn your penis."

Yoongi helps the both of them stand up, then he proceeds to place his hands at the bottom of Jimin's back near his waist. Jimin automatically puts both hands on Yoongi's shoulders.

"If you burned my penis, I wouldn't be able to..." Yoongi whispers the rest into Jimin's ear.

Jimin squeals, his face scrunching up cutely with his cheeks dusted pink. "No, stop."

"WELL, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?"

Jimin turns his head to see a mischievous Taehyung with a shit-eating grin on his face with his (daddy) hands on his hips. "SOMETHING QUITE KINKY, HUH?" he adds. "I SEE THE REAL YOU, YOONGI."

"WELL WHAT ABOUT YOU, TAEHYUNG?" Yoongi imitates Taehyung's pose. "ALWAYS HIDING UNDERNEATH THE SHEETS WITH YOUR PERUVIAN GIRLFRIEND, HUH? AT MIDNIGHT WHEN JUNGKOOK READS SMUT OF CHANYEOL AND BAEKHYUN WHILE EATING SEAWEED TOO," he says.

"WELL I LOVE MY PERUVIAN GODDESS A LOT, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. AND DO WE DISTURB JUNGKOOK AND HIS SMUT TIME? NO." Taehyung looks at Yoongi from top to bottom, his pose never changing. "WHAT ABOUT YOU? ALWAYS PENETRATING JIMIN'S THICK ASS AND COMMENTING ON HIS INSTAGRAM 'THICK KING' WITH THE TONGUE EMOJI."

"YOU BETTER STOP. DON'T CALL ME THICK. I'M NOT THICK," Jimin loudly intrudes.

"TURN AROUND." Taehyung makes a twirling motion with his index finger.

Jimin obeys.

Taehyung examines Jimin's buttocks in his tight skinny jeans. He takes a sharp intake of breath and says in a sassy voice, "oh, honey, you're really thick. Maybe you should see a mirror." Taehyung takes another look at it. "Kim Kardashian is shaking."

"Are you hitting on my boyfriend?" Yoongi asks. Venom laces his voice. "Are you hitting on my boyfriend?"

Taehyung raises both hands in the air. "I'm not guilty. I'm not hitting on him at all. I've got my Peruvian princess already."

Yoongi was fuming. "IF YOU HIT ON MY JIMIN, I'LL TELL YOUR "PERUVIAN PRINCESS" THAT YOU TOOK HER GIFT CARD FOR THAT BOBA SHOP."

"NO. ANYTHING BUT THAT. NO."

"I WILL."

"BUT I DIDN'T TAKE IT."

"YOU DID."

"bITC---"

The back door could be heard being opened and then shut. "Taehyung, I bought us some cheeto's for our movie night!" Taehyung's Peruvian princess/goddess, Dessnake, exclaims. (☺☕📚✏🌚)

Taehyung fakes a cry, his deep voice cracking as he wipes his (dry) eyes. "Yoongi punched me! He also took your gift card!"

Dessire sighs. "Honey, I know you took my card. That's why I threw away your Gucci scarf this morning. Also, Yoongi is too innocent to punch someone. Look at his squishy face!"

Yoongi does aegyo. Jimin feels nauseous. Taehyung cries.

"My Gucci scarf?" Taehyung's bottom lip trembles.

"The brown one."

"BUT THAT'S MY FAVORITE SCARF!"

"WELL, YOU TOOK MY GIFT CARD."

"I COULD HAVE BOUGHT YOU TEN GIFT CARDS IF YOU WANTED."

"NO."

"WHY?"

"IT'S ALL OVER NOW. YOU CAN'T GET BACK ANYTHING. LIKE YOUR SCARF. AND MY CARD."

"IT'S JUST ONE CARD."

"ONE CARD WASTED."

"WELL, I GOT ONE SCARF WASTED."

"DON'T BE TRIGGERED."

The Bangfuck house was always filled with bickering, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

The end

So :)

🌚

dessigonzu