Once, Under a Blue Moon

Chapter 51 : Addicted

[WARNING:  This chapter contains graphic sexual content that is not suitable for minors under 18… Please… pagod na ako mag-remind… huhuhu…]

She is tired. Heart, body, soul.

It has been a rough day.  She has been at Ella's early in the morning, and unburdened herself with her sob story.  Ella has been sympathetic, listening to her woes.  Yes, she could not explain to Kiefer who Jovee really is because she is not sure how to go about it.  She felt it was not her story to tell.  But she does not know how to put Kiefer and Jovee together in one place without Kiefer going crazy and punching Jovee to smithereens.

Then she forgot her phone back at her unit.  She tried using the spare at her office, but it has been a hassle as she is not used to it.  Good thing her calendar reminders are working. 

Then came practice.  She has overexerted her bad shoulder, so she had to slow down a bit and even had to sit out a few times.

Then Kiefer…

Tears started falling down her face.  She dropped her bag and went straight to the bathroom.  She undressed, and opened the shower, wishing for the water to take away all the bleakness in her soul.

And she just stood under the cold spray of the water.

She has never loved a guy like him before.

How hard could it be to just let Kiefer know that Jovee is gay and is not interested in her? She leaned her forehead on the tiled wall. 

She felt it was not the right time to discuss about Jovee's gender preference in the middle of their misunderstanding.  She felt that Jovee should not be dragged into their petty fight. 

But then, she also forgot about his insecurity.

She sighed.  Will he ever learn to trust her? That when she says she loves him, and only him…

A sob escaped her lips. 

She felt it coming; she knew she had it coming.  But she wanted him to realize that he has to trust her.

And right then, she felt a cold breeze envelope her.  Tugging her whole being. She shivered slightly.

"I… I missed you," came Kiefer's whisper.  She felt him behind her. There is some semblance of space, but he could felt his warmth. How she'd want to lean back and bask in his warmth.

But she held herself together.  She closed her eyes, "I'm sorry if I hurt you… but I want you to know… that I have loved only you."

Kiefer dropped his head, remorseful, "I should have trusted you… when you said that he was just a friend and nothing more…"  He stared at the drops of water on her shoulder, "I'm sorry, I doubted you.  I'm sorry if I had to put your friendship on the line…"

"You… you knew?" she asked, slightly turning her head, but not quite, "Did he tell you?"

"… and I'm sorry that Jovee has to confirm everything. As if I had to see it before I have to believe it, when I should just have believed you," he whispered.

She slowly turned around, her arms around her chest, feeling the cold. She felt naked, like it's the first time she has stripped herself naked in front of him, "And I'm sorry, for… for making you feel insecure.  For not putting enough effort to make you feel that you are the only one that I have loved."

Kiefer crushed her in his arms, unmindful of the water over them.  He claimed her lips, kissed her hungrily, wanting to believe that everything is alright between them.