Milly's Wrath

{Part Eight} (2/2)

Sitting on the upstairs balcony, the wind caressed my face as I stared at the stars. I could still hear the music two floors down, but it was easily drowned by my thoughts. The smoke I inhaled only worked for so long. They were too strong. And my leg continued to bounce up and down despite my mind wanting to freeze it.

Seeing Xavier was like a slap in the face. His mocha skin and hazel eyes, with his sleeve style tattoos almost knocked me completely out. Its been so long since I saw him... I forgot how angelic he really was. The shock of seeing each other was mirrored in our eyes, and I found my throat tightening. My lungs itched for the once familiar smoke, and I was so happy to see Kimbrea once I evacuated the small circle that suddenly felt claustrophobic. She always kept a blunt on her, and I don't think I ever needed one more than then.

Blowing the smoke out, I felt my system releasing the nerves and quickly relaxing. I heard the door open, and looked slightly to my left as Xavier sat next to me. I didn't feel the need to run as I previously did. Why did I feel caught when I did nothing wrong?

"Where are Nicki and them?" It shocked me to not see them here. They were always ready for a party.

"Jail." I almost choked on the smoke in my mouth, and Xavier gently rubbed my back. "They were caught for killing that girl, and Kelsi took the wrap for putting one of them in a coma."

I could feel the tears in the brim of my eyes, but refused to let them flow. I couldn't imagine the three of them in orange jumpsuits, confined to rooms with time schedules. But I had to. This isn't something he would joke about, right?

"But she didn't do it..." I took a long drag of the blunt. I let it flow inside my mouth and down my throat until human nature forced me to take a breathe.

" Are you going to share, or nah?" He questioned, holding his hand out.

With no hesitation I handed of over to him. He took a puff. and then his eyes traveled from my legs to my face.

"Why are you so nervous?"

"Who said I was nervous?" My gaze never left the moon.

"Your leg always shakes when there's something on your mind."

The wind blew my hair in my mouth. After a failed attempt to ignore it, I moved of with my hands.

"Its been four months... seeing you is surreal." He spoke. "And I don't know how to feel about it...I love you, no doubt, but I don't know if I love you, or protecting you."

"You don't fuck your sisters." My words came out sharper than I meant them, but that didn't take the validity from them.

"True." The smoke cascaded over his face.

I leaned back on my arms. I felt the moon shine on my face, and the stars twinkling in my eyes seemed to be telling me something. The wind was blowing around in every direction, lifting me up. Despite my insides, there was no tension, but I felt my defense weakening. Here was my everything...telling me he didn't know whether he saw me as a Lover or Little Sister.

I found the thought too much to bear. standing up, I went in the room and stumbled a little as the weed and alcohol consumed me. I could still control myself- my tolerance was high- but the edges of everything seemed to shine and my emotions rocked my body before I could even stop them. A rough sob echoed through the room and I held my breathe. A stray tear dripped down my face, and before I could wipe it away someone else did.

I looked up to his intense staring, boring holes into my skin. "You don't understand." He said. "When the police came, the first thing I thought of was you. And when I found out why they were looking, I had to practically threaten them to make sure you're name wasn't mentioned. And then I had to go to the girl and make sure she didn't describe you to the police. And all I thought of afterwards was how much shit you would go through with me....Autumn, you are so young you don't even know-"