Milly's Wrath

{Part Twenty-One}

            I don’t think I can relatively describe my emotions as Anthony drove both Nicki and I to the hospital, which was, ironically, three blocks from my house. It was at this time cars wanted to come out, making the five minute journey over twenty minutes. That left me with too much time to think.

            My first thoughts were to how Xavier got shot, and by whom. There was no doubt he had plenty of enemies in life. I mean, he was a drug dealer and gang member to a pretty notorious clique. He may not have been the top dealer, but he was good, and while he wasn’t a murderer, plenty of the people in his group were. I always knew his life would catch up to him, but it was always a thought subconsciously pushed to the back of my mind, and I never in a million years thought it would be this fast.

            I regretted spending so much time apart. While it wasn’t my choice to put distance between us, I was mad at myself for not even trying to stay on a friend level. He could die tonight, and our last memories together would be a break-up. Sure, plenty of relationships end that way and people never speak again, but I don’t know. We were always so much more in my mind. He was like an older brother who did anything to protect me and a best friend I could confide too without worries of them cutting me off. It was obvious some feelings for him lingered in me. I would always love him because he was the first person to sincerely give a damn about me.

“Are you sure you have a ride home?” Anthony asked, aggravation evident in his voice.

“Yeah.” I pecked him on the lips. “I’ll call you when I get back home. Love you!” I scurried off, into the building after Nicki.

When I came in , she was already at the reception and cursing out the receptionist. “What the hell do you mean I can’t see him?”

“He just got out of surgery ma’am and is in the ICU. Only family can-“

“I am his damn fiancée.” She slammed her fist on the desk, and I felt my throat contract. Fiancée? Of course she had to be lying. Right? The ring on her left hand finger said she was serious.

“I am so sorry, Ma’am.” The receptionist apologized, eyes frantically looking at the computer screen. “He is in room 629.”

“I thought so.” Nicki replied, spinning on her heels to face me.

“Um...I’ll catch up with you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah…I’m sure.”

            She wasted no time jogging to the elevator, quickly disappearing behind the closing metal doors. I sat in the waiting room, trying to control my breathes.

            I couldn’t grasp the act he was…engaged. And especially not to Nicki. I mean, I felt betrayed. First of all, no one told me, though I’ve definitely seen Nicki in the last month and Xavier definitely texted me. Second of all, she was my best friend and he was my everything. I told her everything we used to do together…how could they even think about getting together? I mean. He wasn’t mine anymore, and I moved on, but not to his best friend!

            Then I realized, they owed me no explanation. Everyone moves on, and they can choose anyone they want. Of course, there are billions of others to choose from, so it didn’t have to be her, but crazy things happen. I should know that.

            Yeah, it didn’t settle in my head still.

            I sat in that seat for a complete hour; trying to hold my tears so I wouldn’t cry. I didn’t know whether I was crying over the fact he was crying, getting married, or getting married to my old best friend. It seemed like it was breaking Girl Code or Ex Code or something to do that. It wasn’t until Nicki came back in view I quickly composed myself. Her eyes were still stained, and she appeared weaker than before.