Life Is A Nightmare

Chapter Nine: His Letter

(Gavin)

I was always curious as a child about why our family was broken when other families were together. I was perplexed in my dad's relationship with a brother I never met and maybe that's what led me to find out more about him. I didn't ask my dad to tell me more because his answers brought me nowhere close to understanding but what did was the letters.

The letters Jayden did send back, which were few, brought a new light compared to newspaper articles. I learned about the scarecrow he claimed was haunting him. He brought up things you can't read about anywhere. Little revelations and some big asking for forgiveness. Talking about what happened my dad now holds onto dearly with his whole heart believing despite his resistance to back then.

There's one letter, in particular, I found in my dad's old small apartment he had just moved into after leaving my grandparents he couldn't stand. I remember the smell as soon as I walked in the door of the place. I didn't want to be there but I was eight at the time and I guess in the end I wanted to look past where he lived and see positive I was able to see him.

Inside his apartment, his stuff was scattered around the living room. He hadn't quite gotten around to putting anything away. Neither had he seen a reason to put all of his stuff in boxes when he moved. Most of his stuff was just thrown here and there. Everything a mess with dishes in the sink and leftover food on the counter in the kitchen.

I took a seat on the couch, the small tv he had turned on showing an infomercial selling something. There was nothing really to do sitting in his upsides apartment as I looked out the broken window to my right. "That's going to get fixed tomorrow." He said eager to reassure me.

I nodded my head perplexed on what I should be thinking about this situation. I wanted to be close to my dad but I also didn't want to see him live this way with empty bottles of alcohol on the coffee table in front of me. "So, how's school been?" He asks picking up the bottles and taking them to the kitchen to place on yet another table.

"Good, I started second-grade last week." I answered. Excitement overwhelming me to have him ask how things were. I missed him. I missed him not being there when I went back to school because, even though some kids didn't want their parents there, I wanted my dad. "I made a new friend. Her name is Jenna and-"

The phone ringing interrupted me, "Hold on." He said answering the call and I sank into the couch when his next words were, "I'm going to go outside to talk on the phone for a little bit."

I nodded my head to his excuse to leave me alone in the first few minutes. I hadn't even told him about my friend or the new teacher I have but none of that was as important to him than his phone call.

He shut the door and I heard him walk down the flight of stairs before opening up the main door leading out. I was completely alone except the only picture hanging up on the wall of an older brother and sister I never met.

I knew it was wrong to be jealous. Be angry towards my siblings when I didn't know them but it hurt. It hurt to know they were more important and I knew only what my dad told me. I knew Vivian wasn't alive any longer and Jayden was sent away for something he didn't do. And as I sat there looking around my eyes caught interest on a container near the window with tape on top of the lid with the name Jayden written on it.

I decided to get up from the couch I was sitting on and look inside. No one was around to tell me not to and this would help me understand what my dad said he would explain when I was older. The more I tried to talk myself out of walking over to see what was in it the more I wanted to look inside more than anything. I wanted to see what my dad had in there and that's just what I did.