tagged // joshler

(16)

the rest of josh's spring break went by incredibly slowly. without his phone or his laptop he was out of touch with all of his friends, though he really only talked to ashley.

...and tyler.

but thinking about tyler these days only brought him sadness, though he thought of him every day. josh wondered if tyler missed him. he wondered if he'd tried to text him, or call him.

mostly, he wondered if tyler thought of him at all.

these thoughts plagued him throughout the rest of his week, and when monday came and he had to return to school, he was utterly wrecked.

his alarm sounded at 6:30am that day, but it was rather unnecessary--he'd already been awake for hours. sleep had been hard to come by for the last few days, no matter how exhausted he might have been.

he shut off his alarm and with a low groan he rolled out of bed. from downstairs, he heard his mother making breakfast. the last thing he wanted right now was to see his mother, but his hunger took over and he found himself trudging down the stairs.

the sound of josh's heavy footsteps drew his mother's attention away from the stove and forced her to focus on josh.

"i see you finally managed to drag yourself out of bed," she said, placing her hands on her hips.

josh didn't respond. he knew anything he'd say right now would probably just make his mom angry, and he was in no mood to start a fight with her this early in the morning.

"well you're awfully quiet today," she said, refocusing her attention onto what she'd been cooking on the stove. josh rolled his eyes and sat down at the kitchen table. he sat at the table in silence until his mom set a full plate of food in front of him.

"you need to eat all of this. you've been hiding up in your room all week and youve barely eaten a thing," she said. josh picked up his fork but had no real intention of eating everything on his plate.

his mother sat there, watching him until he took a bite. he ate small bites until his mother left the room. she was either annoyed by josh's reluctance to eat or satisfied by the amount he'd eaten; he couldn't tell.

either way, once she was out of sight he dumped the food into the trash.

his mother was a terrible cook.

josh trudged back up the stairs with a terrible feeling of emptiness in the pit of his stomach. he'd had this feeling for a few days now, and he could no longer tell if it was due to his hunger or the loneliness that was eating away at him.

josh returned to his room and closed the door behind him. he wondered if he could fake being sick today to avoid school. would his parents find out?

he shook his head and scoffed at his own stupidity. of course they'd find out. apparently, they have the ability to find out everything he tries to hide from them.

he got dressed without a care, throwing on whatever happened to be near to him. he looked at his reflection in the mirror and was appalled by what he saw. he looked absolutely terrible, but there was nothing he could do about it now except throw on a beanie and hope it would do some good for his appearance. he put on a red beanie but swiftly removed it when he found that it didn't really do much to help him look any better.

before he put the beanie back on his dresser, he paused and just looked at it for a moment. god, how it reminded him of tyler. it was this feeling of longing for tyler that made josh put the beanie back on. at this point, he'd take any piece of tyler he could get.

josh grabbed his backpack and walked down the stairs. since he was technically still "grounded", he didn't think ashley would be picking him up, so he was forced to take the ugly yellow school bus. he sat down on the couch in his front room and waited for the bus to come. he didn't have to wait long, however--the bus pulled up to his house within ten minutes. taking a deep breath, he stood up and opened his front door.

"bye honey, have a good day at school!" josh's mom called out from somewhere inside the house. without responding to her, he shut the door and went out to meet the bus.

✖️✖️✖️

HI GUYS

im back.

i hope you like this chapter! it's not really the best but its kind of a transitional chapter. nevertheless, enjoy.

also, how was your day today? 💓 my day was actually pretty great! my softball team did well, won 2/3 games today, so now tomorrow we play at 4pm. so late. 😴

thanks for reading, i'll see yall soon!

love,

milk