His Diary || Taekook

Chapter 18

Taehyung's POV

9/15/17

Hey diary.

I've been so depressed lately and death doesn't seem like a bad option.

Should I do it?

No.

I mean who needs me anyways?

Maybe I should do it.

Death isn't so bad is it?

Yes it is Jungkook. It affects all the ones who love you.

The thing I'm wondering is how would I do it? Would I take medicine? Would I jump off a building? Would I shoot myself? Would I stab myself?

I don't know which one I would pick but I think I want death.

It wouldn't hurt my mom or my sisters because they obviously don't care about me.

The only person it would hurt is Taehyung.

But does he love me the way I love him?

Yes. Yes I do.

I don't think so.

He would probably be better off without me.

I'm better with you Jungkook.

Maybe I should do it.

I don't know I'll think about it. Goodnight diary.

I closed the pocketbook. I'm not ready. The next entry was going to be the last one. What is he going to say?

What if he says it's my fault for his death?

I began to start having a panic attack. This is so hard. I can't do this. I don't know if I can read the last one.

Reading this pocketbook is like an emotional rollercoaster. One minute I'm sobbing, the next I'm laughing, and then I'm angry.

I took a deep breath in and let it out as slowly as I could.

I have to read the last entry.

I didn't spend two hours reading this to not read the last one.

I grabbed the book and closed my eyes as I opened it to the twenty seventh page, the page that begins the last entry in Jeon Jungkook's diary.