Lemme Use You To Love You ~ Halren

(13): No Way

"I don't know, Abe. My life is a mess," I sulk. My brother decided to pay me a visit since I hardly talk to him anymore. "Everyone's life is a mess in some way if not, all ways," he points out. I chuckle, "Shut up, you ass," I throw a couch pillow at him.

He laughs along briefly before smiling at me, "But I'm serious. Why do you think your life is a mess? And I mean besides Ma being how she is with you."

I bite my lip, looking away while mumbling under my breath. "What?" He asks. I look back at him, his dark eyes showing confusion. "Abel, I-I have to tell you something. I've been keeping it for a while now." He knits his thick eyebrows together, "I'm here, Baby Sis." I smile slightly at his name for me before looking down. I play with the string on my pajama pants, finding the right words.

I look back up at him, "You can tell me anything, y'know?" I nod, "Yeah, I know, but...I dunno." He nods, "Take your time. I ain't got plans." He relaxes on the couch while I sat on a stool I dragged into the living room.

I take a deep breath, "So...there's this girl. I've known her for a little over a year now. She makes me feel things I didn't know were possible. I'm not the only one, sadly. She sleeps with other girls, never spends more than a day with me. I never woke up to her beside me. She doesn't come over frequently. Maybe at least twice a week. I fell for her, but as many times I'd tell her, she rejects me each time. She's toxic, but I can't leave her alone."

He listens intensely, nodding after I was done. "What's her name?" "Lauren." He nods again, "Ash, I'm pretty sure she feels the same way. Normally, people who are this way, especially if they go to the same person more than once, really do have some type of feelings for who they're with. Now, the feelings could be good or bad. Don't let that discourage you, but let her tell you how she feels. Give her a chance to breathe. Maybe she was hurt and have issues." I nod, my brother's right.

She could be hurting. I never thought of that since I was so caught up in making her love me. I don't know how to approach this. I'm frustrated as fuck right now. "Ash, don't stress out. If she's not the one, oh well. You're still very young. Someone would have you and if they hurt you, they gotta deal with The Weeknd," he chuckles. I raise an eyebrow, "The fuck is up with you and that name? I thought it was only around the boys?" He puts his hands behind his head, "I dunno, I like it. I still use it with them, but it'll be my stage name when I'm famous." I shake my head in amusement.

"You're a hot mess, Abel." He shrugs and I get up, going to the kitchen. Just then, someone knocks on my door. "I got it," Abel says. A few seconds later, I hear, "Who are you?" Now, I can't see the door behind the cabinets. I didn't pay it any mind, thinking it's Mel, due to him asking that. He always joke with her that way. "Is Ashley here?" I almost storm out of the kitchen hearing the voice.

Staring back at me, was a soaking wet Lauren. I guess it just started raining since I didn't hear any thing hitting my roof. Looks like it came down hard. Just then, the drops punches my roof, creating heavy thumps. "Ashley...who is this?" Abel looks at me, secretly pointing to her. I nod, and Lauren looks at him, then me. "Who is he?" She repeats. "I'm Abel, her brother." She studies his face, squinting. I roll my eyes, "Same dad." Her eyes train on him a little longer before she invites herself in. She slams the door, taking her dripping leather jacket off. She tosses it on the island, rudely.

"What're you doing here?" She looks me dead in the eyes, "We need to talk." Abel stands awkwardly by the door, "Little sis, I'll call you later. I gotta go pick up Selena." I nod as he gets his keys and leaves. As soon as the door closes, she gets closer to me. "Who was that for real?" I roll my eyes at her again, "My brother, Lauren." She glares at me; this girl's unbelievable. I turn and head to my room. I flop on the bed, getting comfortable as she walks in. I sit up against the headboard as she does.

"I said I needed to talk to you." I turn the TV on, flipping though the channels. She stands in front of the TV and I drop the remote beside me. I rub my temple, "About what?" She sighs, sitting at the foot of the bed. I take this opportunity to turn the TV off. I cross my arms, a jaded expression on my face. She looks down at her shoes then back at me. I put my hand up before she could open her mouth, "I don't have time for games. What ever you have to say, better be worth it, Jauregui. I fucking mean it."

She nods solemnly. "I-I...I have to stop." I roll my eyes, "I knew it was-," "No, I was saying that...look, I don't know how to say it, honestly." I sigh, "Then how can I know what you mean, Lauren?" She looks down a t her lap, wetting her lips. She looks over at me, "I could...I could show you?" She asks. I'm pretty sure she meant to say it, but I'll never know.

"What are you getting at?" She scoots closer to me until she was at my knees. "Close your eyes, " she says. I look at her, perplexity on my features. She gives me a pleading look, shutting off any words I wanted to say, "Please."

That's the first time I've ever heard her beg for something other than sex. I nod reluctantly, closing my eyes cautiously. Once they were closed, I feel her shift on the bed. I feel her hands on my face.

Soon, I was met with soft lips, but it's way different from the kisses she normally gives me. There was so much passion behind it. So careful and steady. Her hands shook slightly, maybe from being cold. Then again, she may be nervous.

She tangles her hand in my hair carefully, as if I were a newborn child. We soon break from the kiss, my insides flipping around. Her eyes sparkle, a lot lighter than what I normally see. Realization hits me as I slowly smile, "You're in love with me."

She shakes her head, "I have a strong liking to you. I'm not ready to love just yet." My smile falters, "Of her?" She nods, her eyes brimming with tears. "She really fucked me up, Ashley." She chokes up. I give her a second to get herself together. "What exactly did she do?" She looks at me with the most heart breaking look.

"I tried to fix her and...she broke me."