I Moved On, Why Don't You

Painful Confessions

Joey's POV

What was taking so long? What could they be talking about? I tried to listen in, but Leon blocked our connection and I can't get through. Would Daniel be able to convince Leon to accept his wolf? Would he stop fighting and let us be happy? I jumped at the sudden buzzing in my ears that signaled the reestablishing of our bond and the whimper in my head that followed.

'It's my fault Joey . . . I'm the reason you're like this. Please forgive me.'

Huh? I tried to wrap my mind around his words, but it only left me more confused, so I pushed them away and focused on what was really important to me.

'Look, I don't care about the past anymore the only thing that matters to me is your refusal to accept our mate.'

'You know I . . . we can't do that. If we go back to Kyle, maybe he'll forgive us and_______.'

'No! I will never go back to the psycho, are you insane?! Now accept our mate or let me remove our connection and I will be with him as a human.'

'And you think we're worthy of him? You think that we've done anything that makes us fit to stand by his side?'

'I . . . I want to try. He accepts us. With all of our flaws, he's willing to give us a chance. Please accept him, Leon.'

'I . . . I can't. We're not meant to be happy . . . I'm not meant to be happy.'

'Why?! Why are you so against this?!'

'B-Because I . . . I destroyed our family!'

He took a deep breath and I waited for him to continue, a feeling of dread building up in the pit of my stomach.

'There's so much that you don't remember . . . you were so young and I wanted to protect you when he______.'

'When he raped me?'

'No, you can't remember that . . . you were supposed to forget!'

Swallowing at the pain in his tone, I took a deep breath to calm my nerves.

'You're right, for a long time I did forget, but then one day when you were using my body to make Kyle jealous . . . the wolf you chose, he hurt me and everything came flooding back. After that . . . it wasn't about Kyle anymore . . .  I was so tired that I just gave up . . . I just lay there and let them do whatever they wanted to me.'

'That's not what I wanted to happen, Joey, you have to believe me!'

'Then why didn't you stop it? Why didn't you stop me from becoming a monster . . . from becoming like him?'

'We are nothing like him.'

'We almost killed our brother . . . we destroyed the mate bonds . . . ruined the happiness of the wolves we seduced, we are monsters and our mate still wants us. He still wants us in spite of how tainted we are.'

'I'm . . . I'm sorry, Joey. I can't give you what you want, but if you listen to me I_______.'

'Then I will find someone who can break the bond. You will no longer be my wolf and I will do my best to forget that you ever existed.'

Before he could say another word, I disconnected the bond, my eyes filling with unexpected tears from the decision Leon was forcing me to make.

"Are you alright?"

I shook my head and Daniel pulled me into a hug.

"He won't do it . . . he said we deserve to suffer, that we can never be happy . . . I want to break our connection."

"I can't let you do that, Joey, my wolf and I have been waiting too long for our mate; I can't just take his away from him."

"Then what do you want to do? If we force him, he'll just make me suffer in return and if I give him his way, I'll have to let you go and . . . and I just can't do that!"

"There's nothing we can do, Joey . . . you'll never be able to convince him to accept his mate, but maybe . . . give Leon control again."

I wanted to argue, but something told me that this was the right thing to do. Quickly shifting, I stood watching Daniel as he gave Rowan control.

Rowan and Leon's pov

"I don't want to talk to you . . . you're not going to get me to change my mind."

"He's dead, right?"

Rowan's question caught me off guard and for several seconds all I could do was silently stare into his cold silver eyes.

"Th- That doesn't change anything. It doesn't take away the pain I caused everyone . . . I just don't want to hurt anyone anymore, is that so wrong?!"

"Nice try, but the martyr thing doesn't suit you, Leon. Do you think that sacrificing yourself will change things? Will it make anyone forget and forgive?"

"Please . . . I________!"

"Do you think we're perfect? Daniel and I have messed up more than once, if your past was different and we came to you and told you our sins, would you reject us?"

N-No, but_______."

"Then don't push me away anymore. I want my mate, no matter how flawed he is, no matter how unworthy he believes himself to be I want my mate by my side, is that too much to ask for?"

"You don't understand . . . I'm more than flawed, if anyone saw me with you, they would shun you! Being with me would ruin your life!"

Rowan let out a wolfish chuckle and I stared up at him in surprise.

"I never said things would be easy, but I believe that you are worth fighting for. Stop trying to convince me to leave, Leon, because I'll never let you go."

His words melted my heart and all of my doubts faded.

"O-Ok I'll try."

Making his way over to me, nuzzled the side of my face, letting out a noise that was a mix between a growl and a chuckle.

"I believe in you, Leon. I want you to let go of everything holding you back and trust me to catch you."

"What if . . . What if I can't do that?"

"Then lean on me. You're not alone anymore."

I remained quiet,  already knowing  what would happen when know who I . . . we really were . . . in spite of his promise I knew deep inside I would once again be left abandoned and this time I wouldn't be able to survive the loss.

Sorry for the long absence everyone. Even though a lot has been going on, I won't use it as an excuse. I will do better or at least try my best. I hope you enjoy the update.