Slave For Lust

Lust Thirty Two

Evan gave us go signal. It means nagtagumpay siya sa pagkulong kay Race. I thanked him with all my heart sa nagawa niyang tulong. This may be betrayal on Race's part, but the hell I care. Ang importante makausap ko siya ngayon.

I ran as fast as I could. Wala ni isang tao ang nasa loob ng gym. I smiled triumphantly. Tinunton ko ang daanan papuntang locker room ng boys. I halted when I reached it. Huminga muna ako ng malalim, gathering all the strength that I have.

Okay. It's now or never!

I unlocked the door at dahan-dahan itong binuksan. I see no one. Don't tell me, palpak ang plano? Inikot ko ang lahat ng sulok ngunit wala talaga. Ready na sana akong madisappoint, but then I heard a creak of the door to the shower room.

Nagmadali ako, feeling giddy and all. It must be him! I will see him na after how may days of suffering.. of missing  him. I will be able to---

Holy mother of cows!
Lord, ang gusto ko lang naman po makita siya kahit sandali. Kahit side view lang.. kahit hindi ganito kalapit pero.. sobra-sobra naman pong pati abs niya eh nakahain na sa aking harap! Oh lala!

I swallowed the lump in my throat as my eyes trailed down from his luscious lips, to his hard chest, to his fabulous abs, to his-- natigil ang pagnanasa ko sa kanya ng iangat niya ang aking mukha.

"Eyes on me, Guevarra." Matigas niyang sabi. Damn, even his voice makes me thirstier than ever!
I gulped and stared back to his abs. Grabe talaga, namiss ko to!

"Can we make out before  we talk?" That just came out on my mouth without any ado. Agad kong tinutop ang aking bibig. Nakakahiya ka, Hiraya! Masyado kang sabik eh! Pahamak talaga ang bunganga mo kahit kelan!

I saw a ghost of smile from him but he quickly hid it away. He gave me a stern look. Masyadong malamig ang kanyang tingin that I almost shudder.

I cleared my throat as I start fidgeting my fingers. Gah, masyado akong kinakabahan!

"Uhmm.. ano.. I came here to talk." I stated the obvious. Ang sabaw ko lang talaga!

"I see this coming. But not this soon." Ang tangi niyang sambit. Ni wala man lang emosyon.

I was waiting for him to explain pero sobrang tahimik niya. Ang awkward naman. He won't initiate the talk.

At syempre ako, bilang ako, di ko na nacontain ang pangungulila sa kanya. I move forward and hug him tight. Then, I cried.

"I miss you. I miss you so bad, my captain." Umiiyak na sambit ko. I cried my heart out. Na parang siya lamang ang tanging makakapatahan sa akin. Hindi ko na inisip pa ang ibang bigay. Ang importante sa akin ngayon ay mayakap siya. Let him feel how ruined I am when he chose to avoid me.
I felt him stiffened. And what really hurt me was, he did not hug me back.

I wailed more.
"Captain, I know you are doing this for me. No one's here. Just us. You don't need to hold back please. Hug me. Let me feel you. Let me know how much you miss me. Tell me how much you regret being engage to someone else. That it is still me. It's still me you love. Please, captain." I pleaded, hugging him more, na pakiramdam ko ay kapag bumitaw ako, mawawala na siya ng tuluyan sa akin.

But he's doing nothing. He's saying nothing. He just stood still, wrapped in a towel, in the middle of the locker room.

Then he finally touched me. Nabuhayan ako ng loob. His slight touch gave me hope.. again. Pero langya, agad ding namatay ang pag asang yun ng kinalas niya ang pagkakayakap ko sa kanya at dahan-dahan akong nilayo sa katawan niya.

I can hear how my heart's being shattered. Unti-unting binabasag, na parang kailangan ay durog na durog para sobra akong masaktan.

"I'm sorry." Yun lang. Yun lang pero bakit sobrang sakit na?