HARRY’S P.O.V.
“…oh, god, Harry are you alright?”
I’m not; I can’t stop throwing up and my body feels empty. I haven’t been able to hear what Eleanor is saying and I don’t know who she’s speaking to, I just hope to god it isn’t management. I don’t think she’d do that. I continue to vomit, my eyes watering uncontrollably. Eleanor is still standing over me, rubbing circles on my back and talking lightly into the phone.
“Not really. He seems miserable. I don’t know how to help him.”
She pauses. I don’t know how she can help me either. She can’t. I only want Louis. Is that who she’s talking to?
“It’s okay, I can-“
She stops and tosses her phone onto my bed, obviously having been hung up on. She leans down so that she’s at eye level with me and when my eyes meet hers, her face contorts before me, becoming blurry and unusual. I scoot back into my bed, finally feeling less nauseous. I run my fingers through my hair, still unable to see straight. My eyes blink slowly as I sink into my pillow, Eleanor wrapping the blankets around me as I drift off.
******
When my eyes flutter open this time, I am still having trouble focusing. I am laying on my side and the window in front of me is splattered with rain drops. I hear clanging in the kitchen and roll over to face that direction. The double doors to the living room and kitchen area are parted slightly, just enough to see a figure standing over the sink. A very familiar figure. Louis.
My heart sinks in my chest and I know I’m hallucinating. I can’t see properly; maybe I’m dreaming. I decide to say something and see who enters my room. I start to speak, but my weak voice cracks and causes me to cough. I clear my throat and open my mouth to try again. Before I can say anything, I see a shadow approaching my room. I prop my limp body up against the pillows, shivering and pulling the sheets up to my bare chest. I look over to the door as one side creaks open all the way, revealing the love of my life, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed.
“Lou?”
“How do you feel?”
“Terrible, but I’m so glad you’re here.”
He grins lightly, but quickly forces it away.
“Look, Harry. I’m here to make sure you get clean and stay that way. I’m not here to make up.”
His sad eyes shift from me to the floor, looking as though he wants to cry. My face falls from a weak smile to an ashamed stare. Of course I would love for him to forgive me and things could go back to normal, but he deserves better than that. I can’t expect things like that.
“I understand. Just know that I’m sor-,” he closes his eyes and raises a hand, wanting me to stop.
“Thanks for coming, whatever the reason is.”
He nods and walks back to the kitchen, returning moments later with a plate of food. My stomach growls as he places it on my nightstand and I reach for it immediately. I’m starving.
“I went to the store; you didn’t really have any food.”
I nod my thanks, unable to focus on anything but the sandwich in front of me. Louis isn’t much of a
cook, so a sandwich is to be expected. I don’t even care what it is; I shove it into my mouth as if I haven’t eaten in days. It has been a while.
“When you’re done, you should take a shower and I’ll change the… sheets.”
He points to the empty side of my bed that Cara had previously been in and sighs deeply. I agree, not knowing what else to say. I empty the plate and sit up on the edge of my bed, placing the dish on the table next to me. I breathe deeply as my legs shake, trying to force myself up. I’m extremely weak and as soon as I stand, I fall back onto the mattress. Louis walks over and puts out an arm for me to hold on to. I grip his forearm and stand once again. He wraps his arm around my waist and lifts me up to my full height, which towers over him. I look down at his face, but he refuses to return my gaze. I feel his hand tighten near my hip, but I can’t push my luck. He’s here and that should be enough for now. We walk slowly together toward the bathroom. Once we enter, I lean against the wall while Louis runs the water, ensuring a comfortable temperature. I walk over to the sink and brush my teeth, roughly scrubbing every inch of my mouth. I weakly pull my boxers down, feeling Louis’ eyes on me as I do. I kick them off completely and step into the large shower, Louis staying just outside gathering a towel for me. I gain my balance and as the water runs down my face and chest, I feel human again.
“This feels great!”
Louis simply hums in response and after a minute of just standing under the faucet, I turn and grab the soap, lathering my body over and over. It’s been too long since I’ve showered. Once my body is mostly rinsed off, I turn and take a few steps toward the other side of the long shower to get my shampoo. Halfway across, remnants of soap on my feet meet with the slick tile on the floor and I lose my stance, falling completely onto the floor, landing on my back. I look over and can’t help but to laugh at the terrified expression on Louis’ face as he throws open the glass door and walks in fully clothed.
“Harry! Are you okay?”
I continue to laugh as he steps under the water and looks down at me, realizing that I’m okay. He holds onto the wall but his bare feet slip in the soapy water gathering beneath us and falls down as well. I reach my arms out and he falls on top of me, landing chest to chest against me. We look at each other and begin to laugh hysterically, unable to control ourselves. He looks down at his soaking shirt and we cackle some more, feeling relief from the past weekend. He doesn’t move off of me and instead places one hand on my cheek, causing us to both stop our laughter.
“Louis-“
He leans his head down and kisses me, my lips shaking from the contact. I instinctively wrap my arms around him and kiss him back, whirling my tongue around on his lips until he grants me access. I roll my hips up to meet his and fall into a spell, unable to control myself. Everything else seems unimportant besides his body and my body. I slip my hands under his shirt and roam across his back, but suddenly he pulls away, taking a deep breath as he sits up, straddling me on the shower floor. He buries his face in his hands and stands up, careful to lean against the wall, avoiding another fall. I sit up and slowly bring myself to my feet.
“Please, don’t leave, I’m sorry! I don’t know what got into me.”
“It’s my fault, too- I just; I can’t be here, Harry. It’s too much.”
He drops his hand to his side and leaves the bathroom in his sopping clothes, not bothering with a towel. I turn the water off and reach for the towel he had found, wrapping it around my hips before running after him.
“LOUIS! Don’t go! I need you!”
He turns abruptly on his heel and points a finger at my face.
“Well, guess what? I need you! Not this person you’ve become. I need the man I fell in love with, not the man who broke me. So, I can’t let things like that happen because I don’t want you to think that I’m okay with who you are becoming. I love Harry with all of my heart. How about you let him know if you see him?”
He leaves me speechless, slamming the door behind him as he leaves my flat. I collapse on the nearby couch and pull a pillow close to my chest, fighting the oncoming sobs.
LOUIS’ P.O.V.
It took every ounce of self-respect I had to leave that shower. I want Harry so badly, even though he’s hurt me so much. I just don’t know what has happened to him. As soon as the door closes behind me, I press my back against the wall, sincerely hoping he doesn’t follow me. I break into hard fits of tears, rubbing my eyes, wanting it to stop. I slam my fist beside me, letting it land roughly on the brick wall. I quickly pull my hand to my chest, gripping it tightly in pain. I force myself to breathe, calming myself as much as possible before pulling my phone out and pressing it against my ear.
“Hello?”
“Liam, I really need your help. Can you meet me at mine in a half hour?”
Notes
Sorry! I know I said it would be up last night! I just got stuck doing some schoolwork. xx So, what did you think? PLEASE COMMENT.
Will Harry stay clean or will he find more cocaine? Will Louis regret leaving when he did? Has Harry finally realized what changes he needs to make? What will Louis ask Liam to do?
Thank you for reading!! You're all amazing <3
