Permanent Love • bellarke

• SIX •

[Bellamy]

''So... Tell me what's bothering you.'' Clarke breaks the ice. We were walking along the coast for ten minutes, yet I didn't know how to start talking about my current situation.

''It's complicated.'' I sigh looking at my feet.

She stops walking and grabs my arm carefully so I stop walking too. ''Let's sit for a bit. It might relax you.'' She smiled, trying to convince me.

''Alright.'' I shrug.

We sit on the sand, both looking at the beautiful sea. The sun was already starting to disappear,  so I supposed we were going to be able to see the sunset very soon.

''So, I live in the States as you know. New York. It's a beautiful city, very crowded, full of tourists, I don't know - the normal stuff. I lived there my entire life and I like it there, but I guess I would prefer sometimes to just move to the countryside. It's tiring, you know?'' Clarke nods. ''My parents and their co-workers created this huge business thirty years ago, it's insane. They built an Empire! Therefore they wanted their kids to follow the same path. And that's actually why I'm here.. It's not that I don't like working on this, I actually like it and they pay me well. But..''

''But you want more. You want to do something different, something that actually makes you want to wake up with a smile on the face.'' The blonde girl completed my sentence. 

''Exactly,'' I agreed with her. ''I want to discover things, learn things, teach things. I really like museums. And if I could, I would love to teach History.''

''History?'' Clarke laughs adorably. ''I always thought you were into maths or something.'' 

''Maths?! I hated it back in high school!'' I shake my head in disapproval.

''Oh! You hide it well.'' We both stare at each other, laughing right after. ''But just so you know, I understand you.'' She stops laughing, returning with her serious look. ''I currently have a job that... well, I don't like. At all.'' She looks down, playing with her hands. ''I want to be an artist.''

''Really?'' I ask in curiosity. ''Well, I would never thought of that! I thought you wanted to be, I don't know, a doctor or something.''

''Well, I actually am a doctor! How did you figure it out?'' 

''Magic?'' I kind of ask. Clarke looks at me, raising one eyebrow. ''Alright, alright. While we were eating ice cream the other day, I saw some keys that said 'urgency room no 1' and I just connected the dots.''

''Oh, aren't you a smart one!'' She smirks. She's always doing that.

''I guess.'' I nervously smile back. I hoped it wasn't a nosy thing to do. ''But tell me more about your art. How long have you been doing that? Have you showed it to anyone?''

''To my parents only. And I've been painting since I'm five, I think. It was never serious to me, it was just someone trying to relax. I wanted to scream without actually screaming, so I started to draw my feelings... if that even makes sense.''

''Everything makes sense when it comes to art. I'd love to see your masterpieces one day..'' I grin softly. 

''One day.. why not?'' She affirms, but she didn't sound so sure. I just tried to ignore it, she's probably acting like that because we know each other for four days - which is normal.

''Oh!'' I look at the sky again, noticing the sun already disappeared. ''I can't believe we missed the sunset!'' I was disappointed. 

''We can always watch the sunrise.''

''Wait,'' I make a pause looking at her again. ''Are you trying to spend the rest of the night with me?'' I ask in amusement.

''Hmm,'' She hums. ''Maybe.''

''You nasty!'' 

She chuckles. 

*

''Remember the first day we met?'' I ask. We were both lying on the sand looking at the stars; Clarke's bag was being used as a fake pillow where my head was resting, while her head was resting on my belly. 

''I do. It was ten years ago.''

''I'm serious.'' I rolled my eyes, giggling. ''You said you didn't want me to discover your secrets because I had a girlfriend.''

''Well, do you?''

''What?'' I was slightly confused.

''Do you have a girlfriend?'' She turns her head looking at me.

''I don't.'' I mutter.

''What happened?'' She looked concerned. The blonde girl turned around, lying down on her front.

''Remember the co-workers of my parents? The ones that helped building the huge Empire?'' She nods.  ''Well, they had two girls; Lexa and Raven. Raven is my age and thinks just like me, we work for the same reasons. But Lexa.. she's twenty-one and very strong, independent and beautiful.'' My lips form a sad smile. Clarke grabs my hand, starting to play with my fingers so I could relax. ''She was a rebel. I mean, she still is. I met those girls when we were really young and I fell in love with, well, the rebel. I tried to please her as much as I could throughout the years, I did everything I could- but it wasn't enough. She never enjoyed working on our parents' business so yesterday she... she left.''

''She left?'' Clarke asks, after a long silence. ''How did she leave? Where?''

''I don't know. Raven didn't tell me. She just left to another country and she didn't even say goodbye to me..'' I talk with a knot in my throat. ''The worst thing is that she.. She..''

I stopped talking. Images of Lexa were passing through my mind, it still hurted. I was still in pain.

''She what? What happened Bellamy?''

''She's into girls. And I, stupid as I am, never realized that. I was in love with a girl that could never like me back, even if she wanted to.'' I laughed bitterly.

''Oh, Bellamy..'' I could feel Clarke's pity. She was sad for me. ''Come here,'' She sat on the sand so she could reach my arms and embrace my body. 

''Clarke-'' 

As I was lying on the sand, she fell over me. 

''I was just going to hug you, I swear,'' She chuckles. 

''Hmmm, I don't believe you.'' I said, giggling with her. 

With Clarke everything was easy. I met that girl three days ago and I already consider her a good (and close) friend; maybe because I never had a lot of friends or maybe because she was phenomenal. Or maybe because of both.