St. John's Avenue was always especially busy in the mornings.
I stood on the curb next to Thomas waiting for a oppotune moment to leg it.
A red light up about a quarter mile down.
Run. Thomad ran first. West of town the cars swerve and break if theres something that could get hit in front of them.
East? Nope. Theres no stopping for anyone. So, if your in the road, you gotta run.
You do get the occasional car that slows to avoid you, but most just assume you'll move.
Adrenaline and puke bubbled up in my stomach. Puke more know to be peanut butter toast but hey, vomit is vomit right? And if your gonna throw up, its all the same.
We hopped down of the curb. St. John's is eight lanes of interlapped traffic.
The first lane was empty because of the red light but the cars were soon approaching, maybe twenty metres?
We paused on the road marking seperating the lanes. Three or four cars passed before a marginal space opened.
Second dotted line. Two lorries, a massive four by four, a cyclist, two family cars and a van passed before we had a chance to run.
The next few lanes to hop were pretty straight forward, in and out kind of weaving.
My ears popped and my throat stung and there was some kind of squeal in my left ear.
The sky is really blue today.
Thomas knelt down beside me and some middle aged man stood towering over the two of us.
"You killed him! You fucking killed him!" Thomas screamed at the man.
What the hell Tom? Killed? Im fine. I could see and kinda hear and therefor I wasnt dead.
He had tears streaming down his face and he looked at me while screaming. Tommy burried his face in my crest and made a fistful of my shirt. My ribs hurt quiet a bit and I think my nose is bleeding.
Its dark. And cold. My shadebladed hurt, almost as if im laying on the glass.
The lights change and I'm in a lue and white room with dim shadows and a greeny blue sheet covers my face.
What the hell?
I go to push the sheet back and it reminds me of when I'm a kid and Ed, El and I are playing hide and seek.
I see a shadow of a hand moving over the sheet and murmuring voices to my right.
The cover is removed from my body reveiling naked.
"Oh, well that embarressing" I thought.
I shifted my vision over to my left.
A young lad and a girl stood half hugging and half eachother up.
A man probabally late forties walked in behind them.
Ed! And El! They were here!
"Hey, what are you doing here!? How did you find me!?" I thought
Ellie is crying. Stop Ellie dont cry its okay, nothings wrong I'm just tired and a little achy is all. Im right here.
Why is she so sad? I havent seen her cry for years. I had forgotten she had the ability to cry. She had been so strong about mum and dad and the lads leaving. I didnt understand.
I still dont.
What happening?
"Why are his eyes open?" Eddy said between sobs.
"Sometimes the family wont to see them for the last time. It also makes it easier to identify the body." The doctor said.
THE BODY?! Excuse me stranger but I'm not just a body.
Its now. I know now. Im dead.
Why arent they helping me. Eleanor is wrapped up in Eddys arm. Why arent they helping me?
I want her to stop crying.
"Eleanor!" I yelled.
"Ellie!"
"Eleanor!"
My eyes darted open and I'm in maths. Collapsed against the wall.
My classmates had gathered round me to see what was going on. Nosey bastards.
"Eleanor," The proffesor said "are you alright?"
My voice was choked and silent.
I saw mummy be strangled. I saw Oli being killed. And now I had whitnessed the death of my lil bro who was only fifteen.
He was afraid, he wasnt as peaceful as Oli.
Charlie had fear in his heart when he died.
Did we put that fear there?
Growing up we told him that road was dangerous. We told him he woukd get hurt if he crossed that road.
We made him scared. If his mind had have been clear he would have made it.
And it was us that made him weary.
So it was us.
We killed him.
