Colorful Silence

How I See It

Welcome back you lovely people!
Warning, I know that there is a trigger warning for this whole book but this does focus more on self harm/ eating disorders in one part.
But I really like this piece, I think it has a really good message and it's a bit of an eye opener.
Enjoy!

I fidget with my hands violently, leaving small marks behind.

I suck in deep breaths that are to shallow for my lungs to hold.

It wouldn't be this bad if you didn't know.

But you knew.

Your words cut my heart like the raisers I hide in my closet for when the pain gets to be to much.

Your laughter blows out any light I still had left in my soul, until there is no longer even a star in my sky.

I see it as the chemistry in my brain doesn't add up.

You see it as the punch line to your joke.

I trusted you with such a delicate topic.
But your hands wrap around my throat putting words inside my mouth.

The bitter taste of lies rises up inside me.

I feel the need to stick my fingers into my mouth and down my throats in order to remove them.

I'm getting help I swear.

But in the end I'm the only one who can save myself.

I don't have the strength to.
For your words latch themselves onto me, leaving scars along my thighs and wrists.

My hands quiver as I drop the scarlet lined raiser.

I fidget with my hands violently leaving small marks behind.

I suck in deep breaths that are to shallow for my lungs to hold.

Your words and laughter slowly tear me down...

Until I am nothing but a void of silence.

~maddie