Undercover - A Hamliza Story Completed ✅

CHAPTER 10

ALEXANDER POV

After visiting Angelica in the infirmary I take out the envelope from my pocket and look at it. I have to give this check to Maria. Eliza would be heartbroken if she found out where I was going, but I have to do this. I screwed things up for her, so I have to something to help. I walk a determined walk and headed towards her home. I stop in front of her door and hesitantly knock on the door. Maria opens the door and smiles at me with that familiar seductive smile. The smile that intrigued me before, but I am determined to not let that get in the way. She grabs me by the collar pulls me in for a kiss. I missed that sensation, the feeling of someone's lips against mine. It takes all the muscles in my body to not kiss her back. She pulls away and grabs my hand. "I'm glad your here. I have some exciting news-"
"Maria we need to talk-"
"We can talk later." She puts her arms around my neck. Her eyes scanning mine.
"James isn't home so you and I can have some fun." She bites her lip and leans in to kiss me. But I move away.
"What's going on with you?" She asks crossing her arms. I take out the envelope.
"Here's a check of 800 dollars. This should be enough for you get out of here."
She hesitantly takes the check, looks at it as if it's a foreign object. She shakes her head and looks me in the eyes.
"What are you saying?"
"We can't see each other anymore?" Maria's eyes widen and her lips part.
"What? Why?"
"My wife knows about us and I need to make things right with her."
"But...you said that you wanted a life with me, that you loved me." Tears begin to form in her eyes. She flops down on the couch next to her.
"Maria," I sit down next to her and touch her hand.
"No! Get away from me!" She shouts. I immediately move my hand away and back away. She buries her face in her hands and sobs. Guilt consumes me. I slowly walk over to her and kneel in front of her.
"I have to do this, I made an oath-a promise, to my wife." She lifts her head up, wipes away her last tear from her cheek.
"Did you even care about me?" She pauses. "Did all the things that happen between us mean something to you? Or am I just your...whore or something?"
"No, you were never-it was NEVER like that! All the passion we shared, it was amazing. It was fulfilling for a while. I did care about you, I still do, but...I love my wife. She's the mother to my child I need her. You have a husband who's abusive, violent, and threatening, and I am sorry. But this all started because I felt bad for in you." I pause. "I gave you the checks because I wanted you to use it to get out of the horrible situation you're in."
Maria shakes her head, combing her fingers through her curly hair, speechless.
"You had something you wanted to tell me?" I say to break the silence.
"It's not significant anymore."
"It was a few moments ago." She doesn't respond, so I look at her hoping that I can decipher it by looking at her. After a moment of looking at her, I realize. Oh shit...I get up from the couch and run my fingers through my hair.
"Don't tell me you're...." I trail off and point at her stomach.
"I am." She finally replies. I rub my face with my hands. When things were possibly looking up for me, it got worse.
"I didn't want to be a mother!" She pauses. "Well I did before you told me you wanted to patch things with your wife." She gets up from the couch and walks towards me.
"We could have a life together. You, me and our baby." I flinch at the word baby, that word makes me uneasy. I can't have another kid. Not right now. Phillip is my only son. There are too many things on my plate. I can't have another child.
"We could be happy. I can live a life away from James and you can be with me." She grabs both of my hands and meets my gaze.
"You and I both know that can't happen." I say getting out of her grasp. I walk away from her and look out the window.
"Why don't you want a life with me?"
"BECAUSE I CANNOT LOVE YOU!" I shout louder than I meant to. I go out the door before I can blow my top even more. I walk to the bench I always sat on at the park. I take in the familiar view. A memory comes back to me.....I see Phillip playing on the grass, Eliza and Angelica playing with him, while I get our picnic basket together. We sat and ate together like a family. Eating, laughing, and enjoying each other's company. I miss those days. I felt too unsatisfied with everything in my life at the time and was too caught up in my own endeavors that life passed me by. I couldn't recognize what privilege I had until it was gone. I buried myself in my work and getting my plan through Congress, to make George Washington proud of me. But the one thing he always told me to do, was appreciate family. I now see the importance of that. But the problem still remains, Maria's pregnant with my son. This is a problem I caused that can't be fixed. More damage to my family that's already falling apart. More heartbreak for Eliza. I close my eyes and try to clear my mind for a little while. I try to think of that day in the park when life was good but I couldn't recognize it.