if i believe you | negan

chapter ix.

NEGAN STROLLED through Alexandria's streets, wielding Lucille and with Carl in tow. As for me, he ordered I stay by his side at all times. He demanded Carl show him his and Rick's house, so Carl showed Negan the way.

"How about a tour?" Negan asked, smirking at Carl and twirling to look at me with his arms open in suggestion. "Only fitting for a guest."

Carl took Negan around the house, and we ran into Olivia.

"Where's prick?" Negan asked her and she started to sweat.

"He's out scavenging for you, he probably won't be back today. We are practically starving here trying to provide for you." She said, and Negan chuckled.

"Starving? I highly doubt that." He said and I looked down at the ground, wishing I could defend Olivia. She was sweet and she helped me a lot when I had first gotten to Alexandria and it pained me that I couldn't help her in return.

Her face dropped as she started crying and Negan looked over at me.

"Look, I'm sorry. Maybe some Negan time will cheer you up?" He offered and I rolled my eyes. Olivia looked up at him and slapped him to which Negan only smiled. "I'm about fifty percent more into you now."

She scoffed and looked over to me, but I only gave her sad eyes.

"Why don't you go make us some fresh lemonade?" He asked her and she scurried off to make the lemonade while Carl continued with the tour.

As Carl showed Negan the house, he tried to keep him away from Judith's room.

"What's in here?" Negan asked.

"Hot water tank." Carl said, rather quick and Negan opened the door. Judith stood in her crib and looked over at us, chewing on her hand.

"Well, would ya look here?" Negan said, his voice becoming gentle.

He walked closer to her and picked her up after handing Carl Lucille. I was utterly shocked at the sudden change in Negan. I looked at him and saw his whole body soften.

He turned to me with Judith and smiled. And I saw in his eyes, kindness. There was just something about kids that made Negan become suddenly weak.

I smiled back and rubbed my stomach, hoping that maybe he would want this.

"Think ours will be this cute?" He asked as he looked back at Judith and smiled as he played with her hand. My stomach erupted into butterflies and I felt something I'd never felt before.

I only smiled and nodded my head before he walked out and Carl and I followed him to the front porch. Negan sat down in the rocking chair, putting Judith on his lap as I sat in the other chair and Carl stood.

"Maybe I should kill all of you," Negan said aloud as he rocked Judith. "Just kill you and your dad. Maybe settle in the suburbs. I think that'd be better for my own child."

I didn't know what to say, so I stayed silent. I kept my attention on Negan and admired the way he acted with Judith. He kissed her nose and then handed her to me as he walked back inside.

Carl followed Negan inside while I stayed on the porch with Judith. I played with her fingers and made faces at her while she giggled. After a while, I went back into the house and found Negan making spaghetti.