the outsiders messages 3

3

April 5th.
ELENA'S POV

FUCK.
The first thing i do is unblock everyone's number, and then send Soda a text.

Elena: I'm taking the first flight out of here. I'll be there as soon as i can. I'm so sorry.

Soda: Thanks E.

I changed a lot since coming up here with James. A lot of stupid decisions, a lot of drinking and a new smoking habit. The old Elena that the gang knew was dead, and i am praying that they don't hate the new one as much as i do.
I leave James a note, telling how amazing he is and how great it was to let me stay here for the past 6 months. I pack everything i have here, which wasn't much and walked outside. I walked down Hollywood blvd and called a taxi. I rode to the airport and suddenly got anxious.
Darry is going to be there. All of them will be. Will they hate me for leaving? Will i have to leave again or should i stay there for Grace? Does Grace hate me?
I shake the thought off and walk into the airport, focusing on the fact that i needed to be there for Grace, and make her forgive me for not acting like the bestfriend she needed me to be.
The next flight near Tulsa didn't leave for another hour, so i sat down on the bench and waited. Soon i got thirsty so i walked over to a little store by the gates. I walk around and it occurred to me that i didn't have any money. I shrugged taking a drink from the shelf, putting it under my jacket and slipping out successfully.
Two-bit taught me how to shoplift. I wouldn't have never done it back then, but now that's how i got half the things i owned. I reach into my bag and pull out a cigarette. I light it up disregarding the no smoking signs or the weird looks from people. I lean back on the hard bench and look up at the white ceiling. I kept thinking about what could be waiting for me back in Tulsa. The gang, Dally, Darry, and Grace. I hated myself for leaving them all, and i know how much i hurt them. But i know deep down in my heart i don't regret leaving. I take a final drag of the cigarette as a lady on the intercom begins to speak.
"3 o'clock flight leaving for Oklahoma State is now boarding, Gate 27"
I never thought i would be going back to the place i used to call home, but there i was boarding that stupid plane and regretting it already. I kept reminding myself that i was doing this for Grace and Grace only. I plugged in my earbuds and sat down on on the seat close to the window. I close my eyes and think about what could have changed about the place i used to call home, and what could possible be there waiting for me.