Saudade

Chapter One

Chapter One

Present Day

Scarlett's POV

"There you go. Ready for your first lesson?" I ask Georgia, while finishing tying her paddock boots.

She nods her head fiercely. I smile and lean in to give her a kiss on her forehead. "Be good for Nate. Do what he tells you to do, got that?" I scold her, in a motherly way.

"Yes, mommy." she wraps her arms around my neck. I hug her back.

Just as we pull apart from each other, the front door swings open and Nate walks in. Immediately, his gaze finds me. "You're going to work like that?"

I look down at myself, suddenly very self-conscious. I had on black pants and a simple white blouse, with a fairly modest neckline. "Yes, I am."

He shoots me a glare. "Change your shirt," he orders.

I sigh, knowing that this wasn't worth a fight, or a reason to have Georgia late for her first lesson. "Yes, dear, I'll go change."

He nods gruffly, "Good." Turning his attention to Georgia, he extends his hand, "Come on Georgia, let's go." She walks shyly to him, casting me a glance, she walks out the door with him.

After they leave, I let out a breath I hadn't realized I had been holding in.

Nate and I had been dating for over a year now. Things had started off great, like they always do, he wasn't scared off by the fact that I had a child, like most men were, so that was an instant win over for me.

At first, he showered me with gifts, and raises-he was my boss, after all-but after the initial 'honeymoon' period, it all stopped. The compliments turned into harsh words and put downs. The sex turned more into rape. The gentle touchings and caressing turned into beatings. Even when some guy looked at me wrong, he would take his anger out on me.

Why do I stay with him? It's simple, really. He supports my daughter. As much as he hits me, he has never laid a hand on her and he treats her as if she's his own. That and he has threatened to kill her if I ever leave him. So I stay. It's not like I have anywhere else to go. I leave him, even if he didn't kill my daughter, I'd be out of a job. No money, no house, no food, I'd be out on the streets with Georgia. As long as Georgia has a good life, I think I can muddle through.

Pulling myself up off the floor, I head back into our room and search for a more modest shirt before leaving for work.

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Matt's POV

"More leg! How many damn times do I have to tell you! More fucking leg!" I shout at her. I swear, she never listens to me. It's like teaching a rock. Just because you have a fancy horse doesn't mean you can sit there like a fucking rock.

I turn away from the girl, just as her and her horse crash through the jump. Once I hear the poles stop making noise, I turn to her again. She's on the ground, her horse only a mere few feet away, looking remorseful at his crying rider.

Rolling my eyes, I stomp over to her. "Why are you crying?" I demand.

"I-I-I-I don-don-don't kn-kn-know," she stammers out between sobs.

Bending down to her level, I ask, "Well if you don't know, then quit crying and get back on. This time use your fucking leg."

She nods her head, "Yessir."

I offer her a hand back up. I reset the jump as she gets back on her horse.

This time around, they ride the course flawlessly. "Better," is all I say. But to my students, this is known as a fairly high up compliment.

She smiles. "Thank you, Matt."

I nod, "You're dismissed." Quickly, she exits the arena.

I check my watch, seeing how much time I have left before the next lesson, about ten minutes. Deciding that was enough time, I walk off to the lounge.

A hush falls over the pristine aisle way as I walk down it. None of the girls make eye contact with me, most of them are scared of me. Sometimes it hurts a little knowing they're scared, but this is a tough sport, and if they can't take criticism, then they shouldn't be in it. It's as simple as that.

I walk into the lounge and the few girls that are in there avert their eyes and look at their phones.

Shaking my head to myself, I walk over to the fridge and pull out a beer. I down it and then walk back to the arena. I have a new lesson girl today. Georgia Hanks is her name. I shudder at the name. Hanks. That is Scarlett's last name. The woman who made me this way.

Maybe this little girl is related to Scarlett...no, no way! Hanks is a common last name, that and Scarlett didn't have any family members that were pregnant at the time. She would have told me, I was really close to their family.

I hope she's okay. I hope whatever man she left me for is treating her right. Maybe she's married. Has kids. Maybe she's traveling the world like she always wanted to. Or maybe she's still riding.

My thoughts are interrupted by the sounds of horseshoes hitting the arena footing. I snap my attention to the new girl and pony walking into the arena. Instantly the breath is knocked out of my body. Maybe it's the alcohol I just had talking, but she looks like a miniature Scarlett.

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Scarlett's POV

"Mommy!" I hear Georgia call as soon as she runs through the front door.

"Hey baby!" I scoop her up into my arms. "How was your first riding lesson?"

"It was awesome!" she exclaims, her eyes wide in excitement.

I throw my head back and laugh at her enthusiasm.

"I got to ride a pony named Archie. He was really cute. He's what they call a German Riding Pony and a Connemara. And-and he's a dapple gray! He's so cute, mommy! Can we buy him?" she looks at me pleading.

"Let's see how your lessons go, okay?" I say, putting her down.

"Okay, mommy!" she says, before running off to her room.

Nate walks in at that moment. He places a gruff kiss on my lips and walks to the kitchen, where I have his favorite food already made up for him.

Without a word, he takes his food and goes over to the kitchen counter. After five minutes of silence, him eating and me cleaning dishes, abruptly, he slams his hand down on the counter, causing me to jump.

"Yes?" I ask hesitantly.

"You will never go to watch Georgia ride," he demands.

"Why?" I ask, taken-aback. I knew questioning him was a death wish, but I wanted to see my baby ride.

Within a matter of seconds, he has me pinned up against the counter and he slaps me, hard across my cheek. I can feel my teeth knock together. I bite back the tears that were threatening to spill.

"Don't you ever question me, woman!" He roars, not caring if Georgia hears us or not.

Turning and walking away from me, he calls out over his shoulder, "Besides, it's a male trainer and I don't want you near him."

I nod my head, even though he couldn't see me, accepting the fact I'd never see my baby ride. Oh, how I missed Matt.