deep, dark and dangerous

It's sad isn't it?

DEEP DARK AND DANGEROUS

 

CHAPTER 15

 

JARED P.O.V

 

I knew I shouldn’t have been walking up the steps to her house but I did anyway. I slowly walked up the steps and rang the doorbell. I waited for her or someone else to come to the door. I was slowly backing up when Ryan answered the door.

“What do you want?” She barked at me. Her hair was a mess and the bags under her eyes were just as bad as they were at school yesterday.

“I just wanted to let you know that my grandfather died in his sleep last night. I thought you should know.” I said.

“Sorry for your loss.” She said as she went to go to close the door.

“Ryan wait!” I said. She rolled her eyes before she opened it more.

“What do you want?! I gave you my respect! Now leave!” She shouted.

“I wanted to say sorry!” I yelled back.

“Its too late for sorry!” This was the first time I have ever seen her cry. “You blew that chance a long time ago!” She wiped her eyes. I wasn’t sure what to do. “ I’m sorry you spent hours trying to shove pieces of me together in a frantic effort to create something cohesive. I guess no one told you, but I am a puzzle with missing pieces and frayed edges that will never form a beautiful picture. Its not use to try and figure me out because it will only exhaust you and I can already see the dark circles under your eyes. I know its hard to understand but I never needed you to fix me. I just needed you to stay while I fixed myself. But you did neither.” I let her rant about whatever she wanted. “ The first day we met you asked why I never trusted people. I told you because everyone leaves me in the end and you promised to be the change of that continuous though that ran in my head, Yet I still find myself in the same place, in the end, you weren’t different from all the things I’ve seen and heard.” She cried more. “I can’t fucking sleep! You ruined everything! I exposed my body to you, I’ve never done that with anyone else. You used me to get to her and I have no idea why!” She broke down.

“I said I was sorry what else am I suppose to do?!” I shouted. I was confused.

“Look at everything through my eyes!” I did. All I saw was darkness.

 

*RYAN P.O.V*

 

Breaking down in front of him was something I never wanted him to see. I didn’t want him to see me  upset and him knowing he was the reason. I knew as soon as he left he would go and tell Michelle of my breakdown and the whole school would know and make fun of me. I did feel bad that his grandfather died because I was close with his family but I hadn’t talked to them in a month. Its sad that the only person who can make me feel whole again is the same person who tore my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.

*FEW NIGHTS LATER*

 

“Can I borrow a black dress?” I asked my friend Emily. She lived across the street  from the funeral home where Jared’s grandfather’s wake was. She went to her closet as I was curling my hair and threw the dress she wore to semi at me. “Thanks.” I said as I stripped and put it on. It was a little loose because I lost of weight but it looked good. “I’ll be back later. I’ll bring the dress back.” I said as I threw my clothes on her bed and walked down the stairs and out the front door. I quickly walked across the street and took a deep breath before I walked up the steps of the funeral home and opened the door.