It Can't

Chapter 15

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Friday

My suitcases were prepared and my anxiety made me want to throw up. Tomorrow... Tomorrow, I'll have a new life, a new damn hole life! It was weird to think of that, to think that I'll leave my childhood city at the age of 18 and I'll be back here at 21.

During these 4 days that have past at school, I had decided that I was going to let Julia know about my moving out. She didn't believe me at first, but when she saw that the tears were going to leave my eyes, we went to the bathroom to cry together.

"Stop crying Julia..." I've said, but I was crying too. "I'll be back in 3 years. It will pass by quickly and we can call each other and see each other, I'm not going to the desert." This sentence made her laugh a little bit and we hugged each other. How can I find someone like Julia? I'll never find someone like her.

When I was going to start crying again, I received a text message:

Hayden: Nathan is asking you why you didn't come today... :(

I completely forgot that I had to help Nathan today. It would have been the last day with him. He'll be 9 when I'll see him again (if I do). Wow... It's kind of funny to think that, isn't it?

Me: Tell him I'm sorry... Really sorry.

I don't want him to know that I won't be here for 3 years. Anyway, he will surely notice it.

Hayden: Why? Even at school you weren't like the other days :/ What's happening? A princess is always happy right?

Me: You'll see in a few days...

I must block him before tomorrow, I'll have a new life right? So I must start at 0 and act as if I didn't know him. But before, I want to "enjoy" my last conversation with this special boy.

Hayden: I don't like to wait. Tell me or Nathan will cry thinking that you don't want to see him.
You don't want this, do you? :(

He wants to blackmail me; it won't work...

Me: Just tell him that I really love him...

And that's how I blocked him. It's finished, completely finished. Tomorrow, I'll turn the page to find a white one. A page for me to fill when I'm in Florida. I just hope it will be a good one. A good new chapter.

Saturday

We were in a taxi that was going to bring us to the airport. I was watching the landscape threw the window thinking of how my new school would be. Will I make friends? Imagine if I had a boyfriend? No no no, I don't want to think of that. I don't see myself in love with my Roméo.

I decided to put my earphones and turn on (for the first time today) my phone. There were a lot of messages and calls.

I sighed and looked at them. A lot of calls and messages were from Julia telling me that she was going to miss me or wishing me a happy new life. But I was surprise to see another unknown number. Should I open them? I finally find the force to open them and I could recognize that they came from Hayden. He won't let me breath...