Evelyn is on a mission. A mission to disappear and forget about her past. She wants to forget their faces, full of despair and disgust as she stood in that hospital. She doesn't want to remember any of it. She starts afresh. No ones knows her past h...
|above is also my own edit... (I know it's shit but I liked the concept) Also I wrote most of this drunk after a night out (the only time I could find to write!... a note from drunke... VOTEEEEE PEOPLEEEE!?!!!!)
My eyes are puffy, my face feels warm and drained and my throat hurts like a bitch. This is the aftermath of me having a total breakdown last night. In all honesty I can't even remember going to bed, all I can think about is this dull pounding going on in my head. That and the constant ringing of me ears... I haven't cried like that in months, not since the accident at least. I pray hard that I'll never get to that emotional state again. I don't ever want to get to that state again, I'm begging for help that I'll overcome this draining turmoil that is currently my life.
I look to my right to see Kai in the pop up crib that he was left with. His face is angelic, all at peace and my mind drifts to how contrasting his life is to mine, yet due to me it now isn't. He shouldn't be here, especially not with me. I'm no good for him. He was left here with very minimal things; the crib, some diapers and a few toys... No food what so ever and barely anything actually needed to take care of a baby. Not really ideal, I mean for all Chase knows I could have refused to look after him. But Chase knows me, he knows how much I value family and how much I loved Kai. I reach across and hoist the little guy up and out of his crib. I snuggle him against my chest and breathe in the heavenly smell of babies.
I look to my right and notice an empty spot. That spot has barely been empty the past few weeks. Me and Harry have literally been inseparable, can't get enough or each other so refuse to be parted unless completely necessary. I guess he felt like today was that day where he had to leave me and needed time on his own for a while. This was all too much for him. In a way I wouldn't blame him, this is almost too much for me. However, there is still some part of me that hoped he'd stay and help me out with this whole life obstacle.
I rest my head against the head board of the bed letting out a sigh. I don't even have proper milk to feed him and he's probably hungry! What has he been eating all these months without his mother... without his mother because of me! Kai tugs not so gently on my hair and that's the end of me, I break down into full on tears. Guess I didn't last long after all! Harry has really left! After months of us building a relationship and finally getting to know each other he had really gone. I in no way expected him to help me out in this new situation but over the past few months I had adjusted to the thought of one day raising a child with him. Our child. Or at least him staying with me for a decent amount of time and us reaching some life goals. My mind just couldn't wrap around the idea of him just giving up, after what he knew I felt about him and what I know he feels about me. He just gave up!
Thankfully my dark thoughts are proved wrong by a sudden entrance to the room. It startled me at first causing me to gasps and for Kai to jolt up from his sleep. Nevertheless I physically relax when I notice his presence. For maybe the third time in the past couple of weeks I sigh whilst thinking he came back! I would have hoped his presence would have been a constant thing but our rocky relationship just hasn't enabled us to of so. I can't remember the last time I've been genuinely happy over someone's presence.
With him taking in my distraught looks and tear stained face, he drops the contents of his bag and rushes over to me.
"Babe! Hush, common!" He tried to silent my cries but to no avail as I'm too emotional to even try and form up some response right now. "Its ok, whats wrong. You need to tell me whats wrong. Please!" He comforts me.
"Your here!" I sob, borderline hysterically. This is all I need right now, he's here!
"Yes I am, bless, whats gotten you in this state?. Babe, did you think I'd leave?"
I stay silent to his question. Did I? Yes, I really did think he'd leave me and Kai all alone. What did that mean for our relationship if I thought he'd do such a thing. Could we really live a solid foundation between us both without this fundamental trust?
My questions are answered as I look down to the bags that he had brought in. Upon first glance all I see is a subtle pink tinge. I reach over to open up the bag and almost tear up at the sight. In fact I do tear up. Because what is held in those bags is multiple diapers, avocado baby paste and toys which I wouldn't of even thought to have gotten.
He not only decided to stay with me for the day, but he also decided to help out Kai and I honestly couldn't be more thankful. I pull Harry towards me in the hopes that he would somehow interpret the deep feeling of thanks that I feel for him for doing this small but sentimental act of kindness. We breathe in each others presence and I've honestly never felt something so ethereal and so pure. My heart lurches and I suddenly realise I'm going to need him for the rest of my life.
No matter what we go through, I know we'll always have this moment to cherish.
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evelyngreen: blessed 👼🏻
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harrystyles: @evelyngreen ♡🏹 harryupdates: WHAT IS HAPPENING?! gemmastyles: @harrystyles @evelyngreen ummm... 😶
| Sorry It's so short (and also crap cus I wrote it all highly intoxicated, but I just don't have the time to rewrite and it seemed okay upon reread... aha...... so if any of you have any requests of what you want to see in this story or any questions, please let me know.... (drink of choice for this is vodka n coke, washed down with some £3 white wine (apologies) XXX)
