Saving Grace {Haylor}

Pancakes

That night, it happened. It wasn't forced, it just... Happened. Harry and I had dinner paired with a few glasses if wines and it happened. If I thought I could goto a cabin with Harry for the weekend and that it wasn't going to happen, I would've had to be crazy.

I slither from Harry's arms to the side of the bed to put on some kind of pyjamas. "What are you doing?" Harry asks, to be honest I thought be was asleep.

"I'm gonna run cold!"

"No you won't," he laughs, and pulls on my arms so I flip back to him. Harry kisses me softly, but intoxicatingly. I run my hand down his chest and once our lips part, I snuggle to him closer. He radiates of heat.

"Harry," I whisper.

"Yes?"

"Harry..." I say again and look up at him, staring into his beautiful green eyes. "Harry... I... I..." Not even I can say what I was getting at. I didn't think I wanted to say 'I love you' but then again, how could I just sleep with someone who I don't love. I'm not sure if Harry understand with what I'm trying to say, or if he knows what I'm getting at. He leans into my lips and when our lips part the words fall out. "Harry, I love you."

A smile appears at his lips and he kisses me again, but more intensely. "I love you so so so much." He says and it feels amazing to hear that back. Maybe it wasn't even the sound of it, maybe it was just the fact that I was loved.

•••

"Babe, wake up. I've got a surprise." My eyes open slowly and Harry stands above me, fully dressed, with a soft smile. "Morning." He smiles and leans down to kiss me.

"Good morning." I say and stretch out across the bed. "What time is it?"

"Nine thirty, get dressed and I'll meet you out there, alright?" I nod and he kisses my forehead before leaving.

I change into a bikini, just I'm case, and a sundress that falls just before my knees. It's strapless and light pink some some kind of lace design. It actually had belonged to Karlie. I don't know where she got it but I loved it. And after she had passed, her manager said that anything that we wanted, we could have. We took everything. Some of it's used by me but a lot of it is packed away.

With my short hair, there's not much I can do, I usually just leave it el natural which is a weird wave combination. Within a short period I meet Harry in the kitchen. He stands at the burners with some flipper in his hand. "Smells good." I say as I walk up behind him and wrap my arms around his torso.

"Thanks." He sounds so proud proud of himself, it's actually quite adorable! I kiss his shoulder and due to his towering figure I ask what's cooking. "Chocolate chop pancakes. You're favourite." I get giddy and start jumping around like a little kiss. Of course bouncing back to him and planting a nice one on his cheek.

"You're the best!" I giggle and he flips the pancake and I set up our plates at the wooden table. "So what's the plan for today, babe?" I ask.

"I was thinking some relaxing by the water while the suns in prime position. Then maybe we could goto town and get ice cream or something."

"I like it!" I say sit down waiting for Harry to join me.

Harry brings the pancakes to the table and kisses me briefly. This could be a nice life, as long as it involved Harry and his kisses. "Well I love you."

After breakfast Harry and I are lounging out in the back on a blanket by the lake. The sun beats against my back as I stretch out against the cloth. Harry hasn't really moved. Just say there staring at his phone since the moment we came out. He looks angry, which is odd because I've never actually witnessed him angry. Maybe it's not anger. Maybe, discomfort. Maybe it was something I said or did. Maybe it was about last night, maybe he was expecting something better. I stretch my hand out to take his arm but his busily typing. "Harry, what's wrong? What's going on?"

He looks from me to the phone and then licks the screen and pushes it out of sight. Harry takes my hand and kisses it. "Nothing, don't you worry!"

"Seriously, Har. I'm your girlfriend. We can talk about stuff."

"I know!" He laughs and leans down to kiss my forehead. "Nothing you need to worry about."

"So everything's okay? You're sure?" I look back up at him and he nods.

"It's just Gemma. She got in a fight with her husband and now she's whining to me. She's just a big brat. Like I said, nothing for you to worry about. Okay? Everything's fine."

"Oh," I say slightly ashamed. "I'm sorry, I was just thinking maybe I could help."

"No! Tay! Don't be sorry, I like that you care." He leans down to kiss me.

"And I like that." I blush.

We start kissing and it's slowly getting heavier and sloppier. Harry has a thing for kissing, and I mean I couldn't complain. He was really good at hitting those tender spots that make me go crazy though, just under the ear and then the collar bone dip, gets me every time. Harry kisses me for awhile until I make him stop. Less kissing more talking. Talking was good. "Hey! What's wrong with you?" Harry jokes but I take it to heart.

"We should talk." I say, sitting up.

"Oh boy." He says sarcastically, "am I in trouble?"

"Harry can we be serious for like, five minutes please?" I huff, maybe I had just had enough sun for the day.

"Um, yeah. Sure. Sorry." I look down and he takes my hands.

"Harry, I'm scared." I say softly. "I've let you into my life, my heart. Fully, whole heartedly. But I'm terrified of the future. What happens when September comes? Do you leave? Do you stay? Do I go with you? Do we take turns visiting. What happens." I whisper softly at the last question and I look up. Harry's expression is... Bland. Expressionless. "I love you. And for me to admit that... It's a big deal. You've pulled me out of my whole and brought me back into the real world. I don',t want to go back to where I was. I need you."

"Taylor, babe." His hands move from mine to my cheeks. I hadn't even realized I was crying until Harry was wiping my under eyes. "Don't worry about that stuff, it's a long ways away."

I shake my head, "it's not that far Harry. It's the middle of June we have two and half months left. Then what? You go back home and forget I ever existed?!"

"Taylor I would never do that!"

"Well, I would hope not! But Harry I need to know how this works..."

Harry licks his lips and sighs. "If I gave you a book this very second and told you if was based on you, the past and future all the way until you died, would you read it? Would you skip to the end? Would you want to know how to died. Would you want to read about the most amazing moments in your life before they happened?"

"Well, no, prob-"

"Exactly." He cuts me off. "Life is all about the adventure. It's all about exploring and experiencing things. Why rush it?"

He did have a point. But it killed me to not know. To be in this space in time that didn't have a solution. I had fallen in love with Harry. I opened up and let him in. Did he not realize how scary that was for me? How nerve racking it was? When I was with Milo, I thought we'd be together forever. I thought I would marry him, and then one day in the middle of nowhere, he called it quicks. Everything we had for two years, gone. Vanished. Disappeared. Disintegrated. It meant nothing. So if Milo can drop two years, why can't Harry drop a few months?

I guess I had been in a daze longer than I thought because before I know it Harry has me pinned to the ground, straddling my legs to prevent any kind of escape. His hands run up and down my sides, ticketing me so I squirm. I scream out in laughter and slap his hands away, but I never had good strength. From what I can tell, Harry is laughing himself. I try everything to get him off but nothing works. So I take control the way I know best.

My arms stretch out and I wrap them around his neck. I pull him slowly and calmly as my chest rises and falls. Our lips meet and at first it's a sweet normal kiss. But Harry's hands relax and move from my sides to my cheek. His kissing is like a drug. It's like when he kisses me the entire world kinda just... Stops. Like I go into some kinda trance.

My heart beats fast and I almost feel like I'm flying. Or maybe I feel sixteen again with my first boyfriend. There's something so mysterious about this relationship. I have no idea what it is... But I like it.