The Summer Cal Left

Chapter 5

                                                         *Cal's P.O.V*

  Nothing in my life has ever been worthy of fighting for until Farah came along.  Her luscious locks of dark brown hair and captivating brown eyes have forever stolen my heart. She doesn't know, however, that I love her. Hell, I don't even think she loves me. But she's my world, and I'm determined to make her mine.

  The obstacle standing in my way is my disease. I'm dying, slowly fading away into nothing. How can I tell her I love her when I'm trying so hard to hide from her? How can I hold her close, when I could be gone at any moment? Her simply breathing keeps me alive, but could it keep me alive for long enough?

  My mom holds my hand, sobbing for the thousandth time. I reassured her that I was going to be fine, but she insists on looking upon the negative aspect of it. The doctors said I have stage three brain cancer, and I must start radiation in a week. I've been out of the hospital for a day now. Farah stayed at the hospital with me and insisted she stay at my house so she could take care of me. I told her no, that I was fine. I also neglected to tell her that I have cancer. If she found out, it would crush her.

  “Mom, I am fine.” I say, kissing her forehead. “Everything is going to be okay.” She nods her head, wiping her nose with a tissue.

  “How is Farah taking it?” She asks. I scratch the back of my head, not knowing what to say.

  “Well...um, she doesn't know yet.” I stutter.

  “Cal, she is your best friend!” My mom says abruptly.

  “I know mom, and I will tell her. I just don't know when. It would crush her.” I look down at the wood floors of my home. A tear comes to my eye as I think of my Farah being hurt. I can't do that to her. I just can't tell her yet.

  “Fine,” My mom says, standing up, “tell her when you want.” She blows her nose, walking into the kitchen. I sigh heavily, throwing the remote across the room.

  I didn't ask for this. I didn't want cancer! This ruins everything! How can I become a baseball player? What about college? What about...about Farah? I can't tell her I love her now, not when I'm dying. We will never be together.

  I lay back against the leather couch, closing my eyes. I try to rest, try to forget everything when my phone rings. I sigh and fetch it out of my pocket, looking at the caller ID. Farah.

  I hesitate for a moment. I can't tell  her yet. But what will I say? I press accept. “Hello?” I say.

  “Cal, are you okay?” She asks, her voice worried.

  “Farah, I'm fine. I promise. Don't worry about me. The doctors say I just got too hot, that's all.” I lie.

  “Well, do you want me to come over?”

  “No!” I say all too quickly. “I mean, uh, that's okay. Stay home. I'll be fine.” If Farah came over, my mom might tell her about my disease. Hell, I even might tell her. Farah has a way of getting what she wants.

  “Okay then. I...I guess I'll talk to you later.” She replies, sounding hurt.

  “Okay, I'll call you later. Bye.” I hang up the phone and set it down next to me. I stand up, heading down the hall to my room. I slam the door shut and jump on my bed, hoping my mom doesn't follow me.

  I stare at the walls of my red room. Pictures appear on each wall, all of them of Farah and I.  My favorite picture, the one of Farah and I at the baseball field, me in my uniform, hangs above my bed. It was the summer of our freshman year when that picture was taken. I fifteen and Farah still fourteen.

  Farah and I have been best friends since seventh grade. We have spent every summer and mostly every day together. I can't imagine leaving her before I've even gotten the chance to tell her how I really feel. To tell her that I love her. Leaving her would mean ending a life long friendship, and possibly losing a shot at love.