(AMERICA & SCOTLAND storm into MY office)
SCOTLAND: Lass, what is it I'm hearin' about you puttin' us in "x reader" fics, huh?!
AMERICA: Yeah! Last time I checked, we weren't your bitches, we were your brothers!
ME: (shrugs) Well you- (points at AMERICA) you're vain with not a lot of character depth, and you- (points at Scotland) you're not even in the series. So most fangirls use you as rapist-slash-non-felling lemons. Or, in short, cheap hoes that have no consequences if you kill or insult.
AMERICA: (pause) Well, that was....
SCOTLAND: ...mean.
ME: Yeah, truth hurts, don't it? (walks away)
