Wish it could be... (paperhat)

My Cry For Help

Use image above for reference in future reading. Art is not mine, artwork belongs to it's rightful owner.

Black Hat's POV.

"GreyHat, if you will come with me." I pull on my older brother's sleeve to take him to my office. I hear other footsteps following behind us, Dr. Flug. Dang it, I can't have him in the lab, the intercom broke the other day because Dementia wouldn't stop pressing the button repeatedly. "Dr. Flug, could you stay out of the lab for now? I need to talk to GreyHat privately. The intercom is broken and I don't want you to eavesdrop. So stay up here. Have an early lunch for all I care." Dr. Flug nods but stays where he is. I could tell he was a bit tense, like something was on his mind. I decided to leave it alone and begin to leave, but my thoughts had other plans. I had almost forgotten about White Hat in my living room, standing right next to Flug... "Dr. Flug come here for a moment. GreyHat, you already know where my office is, don't you? You can start heading there without me." GreyHat nods, leaves, and I talk to Dr. Flug in a small whisper. "Dr. Flug, whatever you do, don't go anywhere near White Hat. If he comes close to you just move away. If you can't do that then run." Dr. Flug agreed without hesitation, oddly enough. But either way, that's good enough, I walk away and catch up with my brother in the hallway. We didn't say much until we were in my office. "So, younger brother, what exactly is the problem? All you said to me was that I was the dumb*** and that it was something important. I do hope it's not a waste of my time." GreyHat always puts up a front like this, saying rude things like that, what he really means is he's got plenty of time and will listen to every word you have to say. It's where I got my rudeness. Only his is in a more loving and caring way then how I say it. We made our way inside my office, I open the door to let GreyHat in first. I lock it behind me and I start our private conversation. "Well as you know, I've never been good with my- emotions... And I'm having a bit of trouble figuring them out." I paused between the two words of "my" and "emotions". The last time I did talk about them was back when I was still in highschool. Not as fun as I thought it was going to be. "I see, can you tell me exactly what emotions you can't handle at the moment?" I answer the best I can. "Well, I guess it's more of a mixture of feelings than just one feeling. Heh, uh..." GreyHat gives me a blank stare, his way of saying keep going. "Right, to get to the point, I, um, I've been a lot nicer to a specific person. I know it's not normal for me to do that and I can't seem to make it stop.  There was also an incident involving them and I did a few things that I don't entirely regret- GAH FORGET IT! I'M IN LOVE WITH MY MAD SCIENTIST ALRIGHT!?" A small wave of shock went over GreyHat's face. "Really? Hmm I knew there was some type of spark when you look at him. Hehe." For him to laugh is very out of character for him, even if it is just a small chuckle, it's kinda scary. I proceed with telling him my problem and ask for his advice. "I won't help you with your problem until you take off your hat." Ugh, GreyHat always asked these types of things. He likes seeing White Hat and I without out our hats because it reminds him if when we were kids, when we had mom. I sigh and do as he asked. I remove my top hat to reveal my slick tendril like hair. It falls on and below my shoulders. "Oh how I miss you when you were younger. Oh well, that is not important. What is important is telling Dr. Flug about your feelings for him." ... "Are you insane!? I'm not going to tell him anything! I was going to ask you to remove the feelings from me like when I asked you to remove my heart 7 years ago. I don't want him knowing any of this. I didn't want him knowing then, I don't want him knowing now." GreyHat begins to chuckle lowly. "Oh dear brother, I never removed your heart. I simply just took the feeling of its beat away. I can't remove what truly belongs. And that goes along with your feelings for Dr. Flug." I was upset, I wasn't sure what to do... Now I have no way of getting rid of these feelings.

These feelings are too much...

I felt broken...

Felt lost...

Gone...

GreyHat and I decided to never speak of this conversation again. It would be for the best. GreyHat is skilled in psychology but he can never give good advice for it. "I'm sorry I was of no help. If you'd like I can return your heart beat for you." I shook my head gently no and place my hat back on my head. "There's no need. I'm sure it wouldn't make a difference anyway." I say slightly upset. "Are you going to cry?" I shook my head harshly yes and run to  my older brother. "Sh sh sh sh sh, it's okay... I understand, you can't handle the emotions. Sssshhh, it's okay, everything's fine." He comforted me as best he could. "NO ITS NOT!! *hic* I hate feeling *hic* this way... It hurts, *hic*" I cried tears so heavily that I thought my eyes would fall out. As you can tell, I'm not one to really "feel" my emotions, I simply pretend to not have them. That's actually what makes me so evil. But on the other hand, when I can't control my emotions I can't call for any help except for GreyHat. He once said I should tell my assistant but I only laughed. It hurts when I cry, especially in my left eye. My left eye is somewhat "cursed", so everytime I felt bad or upset, it would sting like hand sanitizer in a paper cut.

It took me ten minutes to stop crying, I don't even remember what I cried for but I felt better to say the least. I stand up, pick up my hat to clean it off from falling on the floor, and fix my hair so that it was unseen from under my hat. "Well, we better get back to Dr. Flug and White Hat, I'm sure they're both worried about how long we have been taking." "Of course, but before we go, I have a small request." A request? What in the name of I, does he want from me? "Sure, you can ask for whatever you like as long as I'm ok with it." He nods his head in understanding. "I was only going ask you a question about the marking around your neck. Where did it come from?" His question was said through bare teeth. I didn't understand by a "marking" around my neck until I realized, the voice collar I took from Dr. Flug a few days ago. I had forgotten I was... Uh oh. "Where did the mark come from?" He was putting anger in his voice, that's not good... "Uh... It was an accidental occurrence, I swear! A few days ago I wasn't able to speak so Dr. Flug gave me a voice transfer collar that belonged to the bear. When I was able to speak again, Dr. Flug pressed the wrong button on the remote and it shocked me. It was all an accident!" I told GreyHat most of what happened and he seemed to believe it. "Ok, if it happened a few days ago, how is it that the mark is still there?" ____. "Um, I uh-" I couldn't think of anything to say other than the truth. "I took the collar away from Dr. Flug and took it to my office." "That still doesn't explain the mark..." Oh jeez... I'm. Dead. "I like the feeling of being shocked..."