If closing my eyes meant being able to erase all the miseries in my life, I would instantly do it. If this was just a bad dream, I would pinch my flesh, wake up and get over with the nightmare. But no, I couldn’t. Because no matter how hard I try, it wouldn’t change a thing.
As I opened my eyes, I realized that it was a bad idea. I hated what I saw. A woman was standing right next to me. Her brown eyes were shining brightly. Her long black wavy hair was glowing and her fair skin was pinkish. Her beauty was a proof of her borrowed youth.
I tried to smile at her and she did the same. I nodded and so did she. My brows furrowed and she mimicked me. Out of desperation, I pulled my hair and as expected, she did what I did. I heaved a sigh, and for the nth time, she did the same. That girl was me. A younger version would be a better phrase. With disgust, I stared at my reflection and cursed myself for being me.
I did it again. It was like a drug. At first, doing it would overwhelm your system. But as soon as you do it over and over again, you would forget how it felt when you did it for the first time. And the only thing that would matter to you was to continue doing it. It would appear like a normal thing to do, as easy as breathing. You knew that it was wrong. But how can you stop it when it was the only reason why you were still alive? You would be left with no option but to obligingly do it again. That’s the time that you would be addicted. It would be unstoppable. And like a long hallway without any way out, you would be trapped. Until such time that you’d realize that there’d be no way to end it. You were stuck forever and you would do the thing you dreaded because you knew that it was the only way to suite your needs.
How awful, wasn’t it?
I blinked my tears away and instantly wiped it using the back of my hand. A straight expression was evident on my face. Unwillingly, I hastily picked up the pieces of clothes, my victim’s clothes, on the floor. I couldn’t let myself be caught. There must be no suspicious soul that would pinpoint me as the suspect for kidnapping a jerk. As soon as I cleared the place, I walked away and acted normal. But before I even got out from the crime scene, an isolated apartment located in the middle of an unused park, my eyes grew bigger when someone gripped my hand.
No, this is not happening.
I heavily breathed and when I saw the one who held my hand, relief flooded my system. I stared at his glorious face and devoured his features. He was beautiful. But just when the time her grey eyes directly looked at me, I felt uneasy. His expression was a mixture of anger and curiosity. There was anger for keeping something from him and curiosity for seeing something that he must not see. I looked away, wanting to run away, but he was too persistent that even his very presence made me shiver.
Of all people, why does it have to be him?
He was the closest person to me and I couldn’t bear to let him know my darkest secret. All I wanted was to remain as his simple best friend but how could I do that? He already saw what I did.
I looked at his face and silently wished that this was just a figment of my wild imagination, that this was pure hallucination, that he was in some other place and he never saw my secret. But no, this was all real.
“What did you do to him?” His eyes glistened with millions of question.
“Something that does not concern you.”
“Everything about you concerns me. There’s no way that you’ll get away from this place without you telling me what’s happening!” he snapped.
For a moment, I wanted to stop the time and just hug him. Liam was the only person I trusted after I found out about my real identity. And now that he’s telling me how important I was to him, it made me go insane. How could a person be so rude and be so gentle at the same time?
