Not Just Perfect

Bloody Knuckles

{ Cameron's perspective }

I ran upstairs to my room. I haven't cried in a while, but I caught the sight in the mirror. Nobody was home. "Look at yourself. All because of a girl. Your destroyed. Your broken down." I looked at my puffy eyes and red face in the mirror and then began to lecture myself again. "She really didn't love you. Why would you trust her? She's too perfect to be real. This was all just one big dream, Cameron. She's too good to last, like dreams they're just to good too be true or too perfect to last. Did you actually think she loved you?" I chuckled at my stupidity. "Cause she doesn't, she loves Jack....Jack....Jack." I repeated his name, becoming more angry each time I said it. I then exploded. "JACK!!!!!" I screamed, punching the mirror with all my strength.

It shattered everywhere, while my knuckles bled onto the floor. Tears rushed down my face harshly. I ran to my room and slammed my door. "I just wanna die, I just wanna die." I repeated, thinking about suicide. "Wait...." Everything took me back, way, way back.

*flash back*

"I just wanna die Cameron, I just wanna die." Alex's voice ached in pain. "Alex don't, I love you!" I exclaimed.

***

She ran into my arms pressing her lips to mine. We spun around in the field. Happily. We then fell into the grass softly, laughing till our ribs hurt.

***

She whipped the ice cream off my nose giggling. "Cameron, I love you so much." I then kissed her with my ice cream, covered lips.

***

"I just... Love you too much or something." Her voice was cold and hurt.

***

"He's not worth it Alex!" I screamed, grabbing her waist, pulling her away from Noah.

***

"I don't understand why you picked me, out of all of them....why me?"

She cried into my shoulder as I kissed her forehead. "Because your the one who I love, it's fate." I began.

***

Alex raised her hand as Shawn asked who wanted to be my girlfriend. We both smiled, chuckling. I remember how bad I wanted to run up to her and kiss her lips, softly, yet passionately.

***

"CAMERON!! DONT! PLEASE DONT HIRT HIM!" She screamed in fear, as Jack's face blanked out in terror. "MOVE ALEX! MOVE!" I shouted, trying to push past her.

All those memories went in that order, flashing through my head. I then zoomed back in on my bloody knuckles and fell to the floor sobbing. "I can't do this! I'm nothing with out her! What's happening to me!?" I screamed, still crying hysterically. I fell onto the floor. The only pain I could feel was not from my knuckles, but from my broken heart.