Welcome to my blog, The Self Worth Diet on Wattpad! Here you will find recipes, personal stories, articles that I wrote for The Huffington Post GPS for the Soul as well as self help pieces. The Self Worth Diet is a spiritual as well as self help b...
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Hey all, long time! I promise I will be on here more often and will start another book. I wanted to share with you my latest article for the Fix.com about becoming a mental health advocate and keeping Carrie Fisher's legacy alive.
Also, enjoy the new promo spot for the show I'm producing and hosting at the Comedy Store, November 7th at 8pm. For those of you in the LA area make sure to get your tickets now, they're selling out fast. http://bit.ly/TIMB-LA - Remember to vote and comment.
xoxoxo
Mara ---------------------------------------------------
It was December 27th 2016 and I woke up somewhat excited. Wait, let me take that back, I have an anxiety disorder along with being 12 years clean and sober so I woke up with panic and untreated alcoholism. It took me about an hour of prayer and meditation in order to get to a place where I didn't want to check myself into a mental institution.
December 27th is also my birthday! I was excited to spend the day at a luxury spa with some hot stones on my back and maybe a 24-karat gold facial (only in L.A., people). After calming my brain which tends to turn on me like an informant, I do what we all do, get on social media.
I noticed all of these messages on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter along with messages and voicemails on my phone. All were saying the same thing.
"I'm sorry for your loss."
Loss? What loss? Then there it was on my phone, a news alert.
CARRIE FISHER IS DEAD
My heart fell into my stomach. I dropped my phone and began sobbing uncontrollably. My head started to migraine throb from the crying. My guardian angel, the woman who saved my life was gone.
I would not be walking this earth if it weren't for Carrie Fisher.
You see, back in 2005 when I was newly sober, my life was decimated. I had lost both my marriage and job and was sleeping in my car. I was making meals out of cookies at AA meetings when I met Carrie at the break of a behemoth meeting on Sunset Blvd in Brentwood. She was smoking a vanilla scented cigarette and when she offered me one I gave her my unsolicited sad story: how I inadvertently married a gay man, just got out of rehab, got fired from my job and I was sleeping in my car.
I don't know what compelled her but she ordered me to come live with her. I mean, she insisted. I was not in a position to say no.
I moved into her quirky Beverly Hills house which sat on top of a hill and was filled with Star Wars memorabilia (like a R2D2 trash can and numerous paintings and sculptures from Princess Leia fans, among other wacky knick knacks). I felt instantly at home.
The AA group I joined had demanded that I go off my antidepressants, which I did and then soon found myself hopeless and suicidal. I would spend most nights in Carrie's bed with her, watching old movies, eating ice cream, chain smoking and crying. I was a real joy to be around but Carrie didn't judge me; instead she listened and literally talked me off a ledge.
