Me Too

4

Sofia came in my room a moment later. She was nearly crying. Her heart aches, but she stood just fine. Upright and smiling, her dimples deep, she was breaking. She shut the door and leaned back against it, bringing one of her hands to her mouth to cover the muffling whimper she let out as a tear dropped from her thick eyelashes. She began doubling over, crushed by God knows what.

"Sofia?"

She took her hand away and set it over her stomach, cluthing her side as she took a deep breath. "I can't do this."

I take a step towards her, listening. I had to coax her into telling me the problem, I rubbed her back and held her for so long as she whimpered. When we heard the boys call out for us -for her- I knew she had slipped away without them seeing her. She has been holding onto her thoughts for too long, she couldn't take another second. "Do you want them to leave?"

"It's only been twenty minutes," she said through the thick ball in her throat, the tears had stopped as soon as they started. "We can't just kick them out."

I shake my head and put my hands on her shoulders. "Sofia, it's our house. We can do whatever we want."

"I don't want to be rude."

"They started it." I widened my eyes and nodded. "You know they did."

"They didn't do anything." Her voice cracked. "That's the thing, Dove. They don't know they're doing it."

I step back, taking her hand. She needs to sit down. I lead her to my bed and I sit on the edge with her. She curls up on the matress, sinking into the thick bedding. "What's been happening? Did Thomas or Cam say something to you? It seems like every time we see Cameron, it's hell for you."

"They both look at me so much differently now." She shed a single tear. "Thomas, I get it- I know he's an asshole, he has been since day one. But Cameron isn't a tool. And, it's not like he's glaring or anything, but he won't start conversations, he won't get within a foot of me; it's like we're strangers. I feel like a child being upset by this, but it is just so different now. And, it's because of us."

"It is different. He's not going to see you the same way now," I say. I won't lie to her, there's no point. "But, it's because he doesn't understand. He doesn't have to get it, but he does have to deal with it because he's your true friend. And, Sofia, he will settle down. You'll back to normal in no time, but right now, he has to come to the realisation that we aren't the same people he thought we were four years ago when we all met. Give him some time."

She dropped her hands, slapping her own skin. "I just want things to be like they were."

"Sofia, you've dated girls all your life. Just now, a few people know. Nothing has changed-"

"Everything has." She doesn't cry often, she sucked it up quickly. She brushed her eyes with her finger tips and shrugged. "Everything," she whispered. "You don't get it. I didn't worry about what others thought when it was just my business. Now, I know everyone sees a freak, they see me as-"

"They see you as strong." I stare into her eyes, they were bare dry, brown, and beautiful. "You are more confident of who you are, more stable in your situation, and more open minded to differences than anyone they've ever met- than I've ever met. Sofia, people are seeing you as who you are for the first time. They aren't seeing you as the person you've made them believe you were. You're vulnerable as yourself, but you're not weak. You're showing them your real self, and that is everything anyone could ask for, to be trusted with the genuine identity of such a guarded woman. They are finally going to love the real you. Like I do."

She bit her lip, patting her cheek. "I don't want to be like this. Being gay, I didn't ask for this."

I deeply take in that stab. It is just a heat of moment thing. "I'm going to go send them home so they're not just here roaming, looking through our shit. And we can lay down and we can talk."