Only For You

Chapter 7

7

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It's one in the morning at hindi pa din ako dinadalaw ng antok! I never thought i could have an intellectual conversation with Matteo. Matalino pala ito, at napaka misteryoso. . Habang nakatingala ako sa kisame, iniisip ko ang mga bagay na meron ako at pinagpapasalamatan ko ..

I have all the material things i needed, yet i am not happy and contented. .I have career, yet i don't feel im successful. Napahugot ako ng malalim na hininga saka matiim na tiningnan ang cellphone ko.

My wallpaper - picture of us ni Tony. Tony made me believe in love, in happy ever after . .Pero gaya ng fairytales, not all have a happy ending. .Ours was meant to be ended in a not so nice manner .

Nagulat pa ako ng biglang tumunog ang cellphone ko. .

" hello . ."

" when are you coming home?" Ito agad ang bungad na sagot sa akin ni Tony. i tried my hardest not to shout at him, nor to turn my phone off. . Im mad, yet i want to listen to his explanations. I think he deserve to be heard. .

" why did you do this to me? " mahina kong tanong dito. .I heard him gasped from the other line. It was dead silent for a while, until he started talking. .

" Im sorry . ."

" sorry for what? For lying? For two-timing? For the video? For cheating on me? alin sa mga ito ang pinag sosorry mo?"

" for everything. . I know im at fault for all of these things that are happening to us. But believe me Sarah, mahal kita. . It's only you whom i fell inlove this deeply."

" Pero niloko mo pa din ako. ."

" Im- im really sorry . .I hope, I hope we could see each other and talk. ."

" di na. .Mailap lang talaga siguro sa akin ang 'happiness'. .Maybe I should learn to love my self more and to start conditioning my mind that there will never be someone who can fulfill his promise of forever with me. . Nasasaktan ako Tony. .Kasi mahal kita., pero i have to be strong. Nilunok ko na nga ang pride ko at tinangap pa din kita kahit alam kong may kahati ako. I believed in you when you told me that it's Only me. . Pinagtatawanan, pinaguusapan ako sa industriya , pero di ko yun pinansin, kasi mahal kita. . "

" But you were never proud of me Sarah. ." Biglang sambit nito na ikinatigalgal ko. Bakit pakiramdam ko kasalanan ko pa ngayon kung bakit pinili nya akong lokohin? Bakit pakiramdam ko, kasalanan ko pa ngayon at kaya kami nagkakaganito.

Di ko napigilan ang mga luhang nagmamalabis na tumulo mula sa mga mata ko. Mabilis ko itong pinunasan. He dont deserve my tears!

" tony, naririnig mo ba ang sarili mo Huh? Ha! Ah ok .. so ako pala dapat ang mag sorry sayo nuh? aba, pasensya na at kaya po kita di kayang iharap dahil Kasal ka! Na kahit na ilang ulit mo na akong pinangakuan ng divorce sa asawa mo na di naman nangyayari ay pinapaniwalaan ko! You kept on telling me that you we're having a divorce, na kesyo babalik ka ng US para ayusin ang divorce nyo , hindi mo naman ginagawa! I was waiting for your freedom! Now tell me Ton, may karapatan na ba akong magalit sayo?"

" Sarah, please listen to me.. We'll talk when you get home. .Please, we need to talk about us. . Im begging you baby, it's only you whom i want to spend my lifetime with . . "

" then what about that video"

" Video?" Tila gulat itong marinig ang sinabi ko.