TORN//Derek Luh

Chapter 23

-Nivea's POV-

I wake up to an empty bed yet again. I have been spending alot of time in the studio but so has JJ. He has been spending so much time in the studio he practically lives there.

I have seen him eight times in the whole eleven months we have been here in NY. Almost a year and as soon as we moved here he literally started disappearing. It's like he has a double life or something.

I may just be overreacting though. I crawl out of bed and walk to the bathroom to shower. When I get done I walk downstairs. Madison is sitting on the couch with Jack.

"Where's JJ? He can't possibly be in the studio."

"He is actually. He wanted to write a song and record it by himself. Felix went with him." Jack says. I sigh.

"Jack I would never ever ask you this if I didn't find it necessary but is JJ doing things behind my back that I know nothing about? It's been six months since him and I have actually seen each other for more than 2 hours."

"Like cheating on you?"

"Something like that. He hasn't ever given me a reason to not trust him but lately I have been finding it fishy he either comes home super late and leaves super early or never comes home. He's seriously up to something and I don't like it. Jack please tell me is he doing something?" I beg. "Don't lie to me please. It will only hurt me more."

"Lele came to NY six months ago because her mom was sick. At least that's what she told Derek and them but she came here because her and JJ have been having an affair. We didn't know until last week. We walked in on it at the studio. I'm really sorry Nivea. I was going to tell you I was just afraid because I didn't know how to tell you." He says. I grab his hand.

"I'm not mad at you Jack. I'm not mad at anyone. I knew that I was going to get hurt sooner or later. But Lele? I thought she was my friend. I'm pissed at her because the man she is with is the man I am truly in love with but we will never have." I say.

"If you want I can take you up there to the studio?"

"No. It's okay." I smile.

"Are you sure?" Madison asks worry plastered all over her face. 

"I'm sure." I say standing up and walking to mine and JJ's shared bedroom. I grab my suitcases and pack them. At this point I feel nothing. I feel numb. I'm so used to being hurt that I could care less.

"Where are you going?" I hear JJ ask from behind me. Well fuck. 

"I'm going back to California JJ. I can't believe you would cheat on me, with one of my closest friends in that case. The friend that is with the love of my life that I'll never have. Why JJ would you do this to me?" I ask. 

"I never meant to hurt you." 

"Heard that before. You said when we got together that you wouldn't ever hurt me like Colby did and I fell for it. I shouldn't have listened to you knowing that I would be hurt in the end like always. Enjoy your life with Lele." I say walking out. 

I call a business to have my cars driven back to California. 

"Nivea where are you going?" Felix asks. 

"I'm going back to California. Honestly, I should have never came here in the first place. L.A. will always be my home and I need to be there. Skate and Derek are not well. They need me, and if that means giving up my dream to make sure they are alive at the end of the day then that's what I will do. I wish you all luck, I'm proud of you all and I hope to see you again soon. Goodbye." I say leaving quickly. 

Alright baby boy and big boy, lil babygirl is coming home.