Heaven or Hell?

Chapter Eleven:

They slept together. That is all that is running through my mind. I had doubts when kissing Jack because of Leo, because i was certain there was still a spark between us. But obviously he has other priorities! But that's fine because if he is happy sleeping around, then I will move on with my life. Or at least attempt too.

However, ever since myself and Jack caught Becky and Leo. Jack hasn't let go of my hand once, not to mention that his grip is like a boa constrictor strangling it's prey. Which is why I am amazed that my hand hasn't yet fallen off from lack of blood. Although, what is even scarier is that Jack has refused to say a word the whole time we have been walking back to my house. Instead his eyes remained fixed on the distance ahead. Yet, I still don't understand why he would be angry. I know why I am angry. Actually scratch that. I'm not angry, I'm hury by the fact that my best friend who knew how much I loved Leo and was even the one who encouraged me to tell him about everything that happened during the time he was gone. Had gone behind my back and slept with him. What kind of friend does that? If they had feelings for one another, then why didn't they just tell me. I would of understood. I would of even accepted it. But I won't accept the way that I had to find out. 

Five minutes later we arrive back at my house, where as soon as we are through the door Jack walks off into the living room, whereas I walk upstairs and just stand there staring at my double bed in the middle of my room. This  may sound really pathetic and sad, but I no longer want to sleep in that bed. Not if he has been sleeping with Becky all this time he has been back. Which has been what? A total of nearly a week. A week and a half at tops. But not only that, that bed that remains standing in the middle of my bedroom was the place where I lost my innocence to Leo. It was the place where I had that nightmare about Leo dying next to our son. However, in that dream Jack was the evil monster. But now I am beginning to question if I had misjudged him. After all he has gone through pretty much the exact same dilemmas that I have, besides the fact that he lost two people he loved due to death. Whereas I lost one person who I will always love due to death and the other just walked away for over a year. But the reason why remains still a mystery. A mystery that I intend to solve. In fact, where did I put my phone? Ah, there it is on my bed side table. Quickly scrolling down my contacts to Jack's name I click dial. I know. I know. He is only down stairs but I am too lazy to walk.

"Hello?" He answers, however by the tone of his voice it sounds like he has been crying. How have I not heard him?

"I'm lonely" I complain trying my hardest not to laugh at how pathetic I must sound.

"Come down stairs then" He says, although I can pretty much imagine the smirk that must be plastered on his face right now.

"Can't you come upstairs?" I suggest in my most persuasive tone.

"Depends, do I get a reward if I do?" He asks, although I can already hear him near the bottom of the stairs.

"A kiss could be your reward if your up here within a second" But before I can even finish my sentence, Jack is running up the stairs causing me to burst out laughing as he tumbles into my bedroom.

"Come on then, I want my reward" He says as he walks towards me and engulfs me in a tormenting hug.

"After you tell me what is wrong" I demand, recalling the silent walk home.

"Nothing is wrong" He immediatly answers, although it is evidently clear that he is lying through his teeth.

"Nonsense. The whole walk home you were silent, so what is wrong?" I question yet again.

"I just don't understand how someone who supposingly loved you could sleep with your best friend, plus vice versa!" He says in guilty tone as if he is unsure whether or not he will offend me with his words.

"Jack, what's done is done. Yes, I still love Leo and yes I still love Becky. They're both people who I can't automatically delete from my life. However, that doesn't mean what they have done is acceptable. But I use to be friends with a group of people who one day just shut me out. So i know how it feels to lose those who you once thought you knew, and I don't want that to happen all over again" I explain, although whilst I talk I run my hands up and down his arms in order to calm his tense body structure.

"So what are we going to do about this musical?" He questions. What can we do? I, or rather Becky agreed that I would do it and there is no point letting the whole cast down due to two members. So I may as well proceed with it.

"We will carry on rehearsing it and when the time comes we will perform it" I answer.

"Okay, anything else we need to discuss?" He questions as he begins to lean down to plant a kiss on my lips, but I am quick to place my index finger on his lips to prevent him from receiving his reward.

"Indeed, I need you to train me" I command, however as I say this I walk out of his arms so that he knows I am being serious.

"What do you mean train you?" He questions in confusion.

"You said that Leo didn't come back because he had to. You said that both him and you are protecting me from something. Something that you refuse to tell me, therefore I want to be trained to fight. Teach me how to defend for myself" I demand. Where for a moment he seems hesitant to answer. Until finally he looks at me with a look of admiriation as well as respect.

"Okay, I will teach you how to fight. However I have conditions!" He answers with a serious look, to which I nod my head signalling him to proceed with these so called conditions.

"Number one, you do what I say and when I say during training" He states to which I nod my head in agreement. After all he will be the teacher and I will be the student, only fair. "Number two, when I say stop, you have to stop you can not push yourself too far otherwise you can end up seriously hurt!" He adds, where once again I nod in agreement. "Number three, under no circumstances are you to leave this house without me surpervising you until your parents return!" He says. Wait what? No way. It's a free country. However, Jack senses my objection and begins to protest. "The reason for that is because with your parents out of the house no one is here to protect you. Therefore think of me as your personal body gaurd" He concludes with of course his signature smirk. Naughty boy.

"Is that all?" I ask just to make sure there aren't anymore.

"No, although I do have a question" He says moving closer towards me until we are both at arms length of one another.

"And what may that be?" I ask seductively.

"Do you love me?" He questions with a look of what seems like lust and desire in his eyes. Love? Woah, where did that come from. Haven't I just said that I love Leo. But he obviously doesn't love me, so surely I should be able to move on from him. Right?

"I don't love you no" I say with a guilty tone, but I am quick to elloberate my answer, where with each sentence that I say I take a step closer towards him. "But I expereience these feelings when I am with you that not even Leo could make me feel. Therefore, I believe I could learn to love you. Maybe not right away but slowly I'm sure I can. But one thing is for certain" I say, waiting for Jack to say "And what is that?" Where once he does I answer  "I can not live a moment longer with out one of your kisses" And with that Jack quickly plants a kiss on my lips and begins to walk me backwards until I am pressed up against a wall. Finally, once we both break away for air. We decide to make a start on rehearsing the songs that we will have to be performing. Starting with our duet that we will be performing together, are you ready for love? By Lawson. And actually in regards to that song, I don't think Ms Coles could of picked a more suited song for a more suited moment.