Heaven or Hell?

Chapter Twenty-One

Sun. That is what shines down on me as I lead Leo to Liam's grave. Although, I can't help but feel slightly complete with his fingers entwined with mine.

"I am sorry" Leo says as we walk.

"Sorry about what?" I ask in confusion. Has he got anything to apologise for?

"For leaving you. You were the best thing that ever happened to me and I just left you" he answers with a guilty expression on his face. An expression that makes me weak at the knees.

"It's okay, besides you weren't to know that you would be leaving me behind pregnant" I respond whilst pulling him into a hug.

"Actually I had some sort of clue that you were with all the throwing up you were doing" he answers with guilty tone.

"Can we just forget about it. Please." I say although it comes out more as a question. Because the last thing I want to do is be reminded of something that never happened. Or at least did happen but didn't last.

"But that's the thing, I don't want to forget" He answers whilst pulling away from our embrace to look me in the eyes. But before I can object he begins to talk again.

"I know it sounds horrible Zoey, but I don't want to forget the life we had. The life we created even if I never got to see him, Liam will always be in my heart just like you" He adds. But as he talks the tears that have been threatening to fall since his return, finally make them self known as they fall freely down my cheeks.

"So can you do me a favour?" He asks after a moment of silence.

Where absently minded I nod my head.

"Never forget, always remember the time that we shared together. The time that we have left together" He states with such seriousness it actually makes me concerned.

"But most of all never forget about us" He adds, although he emphasises the word "us"

"What do you mean by us?" I question, as I believe I know what he means and I'm pretty sure what he means is what I want. But I still need that clarification.

"Allow me to remind you" is all I hear before his lips are placed on mine. But this kiss isn't urgent or lustful. This kiss is gentle, soft and full of love. An exact replica to the kiss we first shared when we began dating. And I know this will sound crazy but as soon as his lips are placed on mine, a slideshow of images flash in my mind of both of us laughing and having fun. The way we use to be when life was normal.

"Can you do me that favour?" He asks as he pulls away and rests his temple upon mine.

"I promise" I say as I place my lips on his once again to show my commitment towards it. Although, the only remaining question in my head now is where do we both go from here?

"Come on, Liam's grave is just a few minutes away" I say, attempting to get there faster to see my son.

However, as both myself and Leo arrive at the grave yard a feeling of grief overwhelms me.

"Are you okay?" Leo asks from beside me.

"I'm fine, it's just something doesn't feel right" I state as the area seems to be quiet. Too quiet.

"Well it is a grave yard Zoey" Leo reminds me.

"I know, but it's never this quiet" I answer before showing him where our son was led to rest.

But just as we are a few metres away from my son, our son even. Leo grabs my wrist and turns me around at such a speed I'm surprised I didn't get whiplash.

"Run away" He states with a serious look on his face. What? What the hell is that suppose to mean?

"Come again?" I ask with a look of horror.