Paper Cuts (COMPLETED)

Chapter Thirty-Six: The Accused

The rest of that Saturday night spilled over into Sunday morning like an overflowing bath pooling under the door. I called Thea's mum, who rushed to the hospital in hysterics. Soon, Eliza, Abbey and Lola were also there, comforting her.

Will drove me and Shiloh home at two in the morning, all three of us exhausted. At my house, I reached over and switched off the ignition, and Will looked at me tiredly.

"What are you doing, Sarah?" He yawned.

"You're too tired to drive all the way home now," I said, and I opened the driver's side to tug him out. It didn't take much for him to give in, and perhaps that goes with the theory that willpower decreases as the night wears on.

We shuffled silently into my house, up the stairs and into my dark room, where I didn't even bother to take off my dress. I stared, confused, at my shoes, wondering how to get them off in the dark. I gave up and face planted onto my bed. Will took off my shoes and his shirt, and flopped onto the bed beside me.

"I'm going to have to explain this to my mum, you know?" I mumbled into the pillow. Will grunted in response.

I don't remember starting to cry. But suddenly I was, and it shook my whole body as I cried. Will stroked my back, and I turned around to face him.

"I should've done something," I gasped, "I could have stopped it. It's all my fault."

Will hushed me, "No, it's not. You were in shock, just like any normal person would be. You did the right thing tonight, Sarah. You were the one who helped Thea, okay?" He pulled me closer. "Don't think about it. We're both exhausted."

My crying began to fade, and I turned around so that Will had his arm around me from behind. With salty lips and dry cheeks, I fell asleep.

--

I woke up at eleven to a fierce knocking on my door. I cracked my eyes open just as Mum swung open the door, and froze at the sight of Will and I.

"What is-"

"Mum!" I yelled, and sprung up from the bed. I rushed towards her, pushing her back out into the hallway, and closed my bedroom door on a startled and shameful Will.

"What is going on?" She hissed, "Have you been... sexually active?"

I cringed and stammered, "No! No - Mum! Let me explain."

I told Mum everything about what happened last night, and she made an 'oh' sound.

"Is that why Thea's at the door?"

"What?"

I raced down the stairs and opened the door, where Thea stood with her mum. My shocked expression must have been obvious, for Thea forced a nervous smile.

"Hey, Sarah."

"Um, hi," I said, shaking myself mentally, "How are you feeling?"

She shrugged, "I'm okay."

Mum joined me at the door. "So what's this about the police?"

My eyebrows shot up into my hair, and Thea jumped to explain, "We were wondering if you would come and make a statement as a witness to what..." she looked at her feet, "happened last night."

I was speechless for a second, and then realised what she was asking, "Oh. Yeah, of course. Of course," I ran back into the corridor to get my coat so I could cover my outfit from last night.

Thea's mum drove me, Thea and my mum down to the station, an envelope of medical results clutched tightly in Thea's hand. I offered her a smile every time she looked at me.

The police had us make statements and sign a million documents. My mum and Thea's mum stayed to discuss some things with the officers, and I sat in the waiting room with Thea.

"Everything's so fucked up right now."

I turned to look at Thea. I nodded, "Yeah. Don't worry, they'll punish James for this. I will testify at a million trials if that's what it takes."

Thea gave me an appreciative half-smile, and then looked away. She was wearing her glasses, which she hadn't worn since Year 7.

"I don't mean that," she said after a while. "I mean everything that happened. To us."

My pulse raced. Thea was the one person I was hoping to never confront on this issue.

"What were we even fighting about?" Thea said, "I can't remember."

I shrugged, pretending that I didn't either. "I'm sorry, though. I really am."

Thea considered me with a bemused look, "Why are you apologising?"

I didn't respond.

"Sarah we were the ones who were complete arseholes to you - and don't blame the other girls either. It was all my idea. I made them do it." She said it almost shamelessly, though still retained an element of regret in her tone.

"And Clara's funeral," she shook her head, "I wanted to blame it on you, you know? I just needed someone to blame. Her depression got really bad after that night at Jacob's party. We all tried to help her, but she wasn't getting any better," tears fell in a consistent stream down her cheeks, fogging her glasses slightly.

"She just felt awful about what had happened between us," Thea continued, "Which I guess is really my fault."

She looked at me, silently begging me to forgive her. I put my hand on her upper arm.

"It's no one's fault. Clara died because she was unwell, and nobody knew how to help her. Not even you, Thea. It's not your fault," I insisted, and Thea pushed her fingers into her eyes, scrubbing at them as she pushed her glasses up.

"I'm really sorry," she said with a strained voice, trying not to cry, "I'm really sorry Sarah. I've been such a horrible person. I'm so, so sorry."

I couldn't say anything, too stunned to even think too hard about what I was witnessing. Almost a year's worth of pain seemed to leach itself from my body, washed away by Thea's silent tears.

I gave her a reassuring smile, and pulled her into a hug. She wrapped her arms around me tightly, and with that I knew one thing for certain - everything was going to be okay.