Tainted Love [Black Veil Brides]

Chapter 21

“How are you today?”

“Not good.”

“Why not?”

“Because I'm just not.”

“Alright, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to.” I looked at her and sighed.

“I feel really upset. I still haven't gotten over anything.”

“I'm certain that you will with time. How's Andy? Is he helping you?”

“Yeah, he's great. They all are.”

I sat nervously on the sofa, facing my therapist the hospital had referred me to. I gulped nervously. This was my second session with her.

Her probing questions left me uneasy but I knew she was trying to help me. It was probably for the best if I wanted to get better.

“That's good. How do you feel, looking back on that night you tried to commit suicide?” She asked gently, leaning forward a little. She wasn't judgemental which was good.

“I don't know. I regret it, of course.” I answered, my eyes darting across the room. I just felt so violated.

“Can you tell me about your self-harm?”

“Well...”

My mind went back a few years and I looked at her, swallowing hard.

*

I had to explain everything, well as much as I could without breaking down too much.

I told her about my parents' hand in this, my attack and how I'd gotten bullied at school. They were all reasons to cut but I'm getting better now. I have been for two weeks.

Everybody's helped me so much even if I am undeserving.

“How are you, Rosie?” I heard Andy's voice and I narrowed my eyes at him.

“I've already been over this with my therapist. I'm fine.” I said, not lying entirely. I did feel better now that I was at home.

“Well, just checking.” He planted a gentle kiss on my lips that left me smiling. I looked up at him and realised how much he had changed from when I first met him.

His hair was now a lot shorter with a fringe on the side of his face. He had never looked more attractive. He'd cut it when I was in hospital and when he came to see me, I almost didn't recognise him. He noticed me staring at him and I saw a blush creep up his neck. I giggled, a sound so foreign to my own ears, and hugged him tightly.

“We should go do something.” He spoke, caressing my cheek.

“Like what?”

“I don't know, let's go for a walk. I'll show you my special place.”

“You have a special place?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yep.” A grin adorned his features, making him seem like a child.

“Come on, then.” I said, pulling him up. He led the way and got into his car.

“Lazy ass.” I muttered, earning a playful glare from my boyfriend.

“I'll have you know, it's quite far! I can't walk that much.” He exaggerates, turning the radio on. I chuckle quietly and we fall into a comfortable silence, the hum of the radio was the only sound in the car.

I closed my eyes and thought about everything that's gone on in the past few months.

It's been so chaotic that it was easy to lose track of time. In those months, I've made so many great friends yet, I've faced so much. I looked down at my wrists and cringed, the familiar tears pricking my eyes. I blink them away as Andy stops the car.