The House

O!RUL8, 2?

Nam-joon P.O.V

     It was Saturday, so I didn't have to get up and do anything. So, that's just what I did. Nothing. I just sat down on my bed, with my cover wrapped around me and I kept the light off in my room. I noticed that my phone kept going off, telling me that I had new messages. Which I knew was probably all from Dae. I heard the door to my room open and I knew that it was my parents.

    I heard my mom sigh. "Why are you still in bed? Why are you not studying? At least for a little bit you ought to study." I ignored her and kept staring out my window. "What are we going to do honey? It seems like there's nothing we can do to get it through his head. He doesn't care at all."

    My mom threw her arms up in frustration. "I give up! I have no energy left. Just let him be. If he wants to go through life not working hard for anything, let him. I'm officially done." She stomped out of my room in fits of anger.

    All I heard from my dad was "tsk" and he followed closely behind my mom. Lately, my parents have stopped communicating with me. They just keep going on about their daily lives like I'm not even here. I mean, it's no different from how they were before but at least they did talk to me, even if it were only about my grades and studying. It's like I hurt their pride or something. Being my parents, their smart son was their pride and joy. They were glad that they could brag about their son to their colleagues and friends.

    When quietness came back into my room, I fell back against my bed and rolled over on my side. Waking up is painful, breathing is painful, walking is painful, sleeping is painful and talking is painful. I have completely given up. So recently, I've become interested in death so much that funerals became my source of entertainment.

    "I wonder how my death would be?" I asked out loud to no one in particular. I'm so infatuated with death that I went to get my picture taken and went to buy some white chrysanthemums for my funeral. It's not me personally thinking about it, it's the demons within. They're dark and they whisper death into my ears. They put depression on my mind and spread loneliness all over my soul. They're everywhere...and I'm continuously letting them come in. I'm welcoming them into my body. It is now their home.

    I, on the other hand, have gotten eight ideas on how to kill myself. Cutting, drowning, electrocution, hanging, jumping, overdose, poisoning and then suffocation. Just thinking about it, I couldn't help but smile. Honestly, I doubt anyone would miss me at all. Rather, they would probably throw a party. It took weeks but I finally accepted it.

    My parents have given up hope for me. It's not like they had any to begin with anyway. All they care about are grades. They don't care about me. All because of a slip up, one slip up, their whole life was over because of it. I'm completely over it.

    Once again, I heard a knock on my door. I heard his voice. The voice that I have been waiting to hear since I found out he didn't tell on me. "Nam-joon..." I heard Dae softly whisper. The door closed and I heard his footsteps come closer. I could feel his presence hover right above my bed. He then sat down on the corner of my bed. "Why are you being like this huh? Really...I don't even know what I did that made you so angry at me. Why..."

   I stayed on my side and left my back facing him. I didn't feel like talking to him and I pulled my covers tighter around my body as to barricade myself from being approached. Soft sniffles could be heard from behind me. My mind went back to thinking about the white chrysanthemums and how pretty they were. The whiteness of the flowers was so enticing that it was enough to pull you in.

    Jongdae angry voice dragged me out from the thoughts that was running wild in my mind. "What is wrong with you!? We've been friends for so long and now you're shutting me out? It's like you're not even Nam-joon anymore. It's like someone else has took shelter in your body." He then started ranting about depression and why you should talk to people about it. I was getting annoyed at his useless words and I sat up and yelled, "Get out." He looked even more pissed. Good, the demon whispered sickeningly sweet in my ears. "Oh? He speaks." The voices were starting to consider using the noose for him instead.