"Jesus, where is he?" I thought. I've been sitting in this parking lot for a little over an hour and Jeff was nowhere to be see. "Did he get lost?" I wondered. Pfft. He's not that stupid. Plus he's been here longer than I. He could have possibly been jumped by Zalgo's minions. I heared they were all over the place. Either way I was pretty sure he would be able to make sushi from hell with them. The things he does to people with that knife are... I studdered at the thought.
I gave up and started to head back to the house untill I saw Jeff burst through the tree line. The look on his face was odd, like he saw a ghost or something.
After a tick passed over me I yelled, "Where in fuck's sake were you Jeff!? I've been waiting here for over an-" I noticed that his jacket is torn to shreds and there were gashes all over his body. This confused me untill something came bounding out fromt he woods behind him. Clearly the reason Jeff was in the state he was in at that moment was due to the meat hook like claws on the thing bounding after him
Jeff stopped in front of me. "What the fuck are you doing just stairing at the thing, Rogers?! Help!" he screamed at me.
"What is that thing?" i ask.
"That, my diseased infested friend, is one of Zalgo's behemoths. Now, if you don't want to be shredded to pieces by this thing, help me kill it!"
I nodded and we both faced the thing. "I'll get it's attention and you get him from behind." Jeff ordered. He stood in the thing's path and waved his arms in the air and yelled "Come and get me you lousy, fiery hell lover!"
I took the diversion and went around the thing, giving it a wide birth. Jeff was still taunting it. "Yeah! That's it. Come eat me! I will give you disentairy for weeks!." I finaly got behind the thing and i got myself a running start. I vaulted off of it's back foot and landed on it's back. The behimoth went mad, throwing it's head from side to side and bucking like a bull.
I grabbed hold of one of it's horns and threw my other hand that was holding a hatchet in the air. I yelled, "Yeeeeeaa dogy!" and brought the hatchet down on the thing's skull. The hatchet penetrated the bone like it was paper. It buried its self deep. I stood on it's back and yanked it out. I hopped down to the ground and grinned at Jeff, even though he could only see my cheeks rise.
"Rogers, you are one insane motherfucker," he chuckled.
"You know it," I said. "So what was it you wanted me to come here for in the first place?"
"Right. The reason I wanted to talk to you is bevause of big boy here," he jabbed his thumb in the direction of the behemoth whih was taking its sweet time dissolving. "Zalgo seems to have sent minions out into the overworld. The realm of the creepypastas and, here's the worst part, the realm of humans. I know what you're thinking. Why in the hell would we care about the world of humans. But if they are all wiped out, what will we hunt? Wimpy-ass animals? They are as easy to kill as a bug! Not to mention they dont put up much of a fight. So do you get my reasoning?"
I pondered this for a second. "Oh sure Jeffy-Jeff. Its not because you have a soft spot for the women of the world. I totally get it!" With that Jeff took a swing at me. I easily dodged it. I think he anticipated I would duck that certain way because he swung his knife in that direction and dug it into my side. It HURT! You don't eve-- wait...it... it hurt...
It fucking HURT. My eyes widened and my hand went to my side. "O-ow..." I said shocked.
Jeff was laughing so hard, "Hahahaha! Hahaha! Haha...wait. What did you just say?"
The he looked at my side which was bleeding heavily. I never bleed. His eyes widened. Which I would have laughed at because it looked like his eyeballs were about to pop out of his head. But at that moment, I was a bit too preoccupied with the blood seeping through my jacket and fingers.
"T-that hurt," the whole left side of my body ticked intensley, making me convulse into a ball.
"I t-t-tink I'm h-h-having a p-p-p-panick attack J-Jeff." I studdered uncontrollably. "H-help me!"
"Holy fucking shit, Toby!" Jeff yelled. He lifted me up with a slight grunt and took off to the house.
