Just Like Old Times

Chapter 7: Silent Hugs in the rain...

Toms p.o.v

I looked up from my walm cup of tea, to see Tord leaving.
"Where you going?" My voice was low and the question sounded more like a grunt.
"Gonna see if Edd or Matt have any pain killers, for your head ache."
"No, don't." I said simply.
"How come?"
"Well, I told Edd I would stop drinking, and you saw how upset he got last time. So if you go over for pain killers, he'll find out and get angry."
"Oh-"
"-we have a couple of quid on the bedside table, go get it and we can go to the shops."
"We?"
"I'm not being left alone again."
"Fair enough," I watched him leave to the bedroom. As he left I took the final few sips of my drink and yelled at down the hall,
"Oi, Tord? You coming?"
"Yep, just had to find my hoodie."
"God, you took longer than Matt."
"Is that even possible?" He chuckled at his own joke, I just rolled my eyes and let a small smile appear on my face.

We walked out the door and saw Matt leaving Edds apartment.....
"Hay, Matt,"
"Howdy neighbours." He mumbled back.
"Umm... Matt-" I began to question him, "any reason your leaving Edd's apartment instead of yours at 5 o'clock at night, when I know for a fact your hair treatment shouldv'e started half an hour ago. However instead if shampoo in your hair, you look and sound like youv'e just woken up?" 
"Oh, umm-" the problem with Matf being a natural ginger means he has 'ginger skin:' freckly and pale, so it was easy to see the blush forming.
"Don't sweat it Matt." Tord spoke up. I shared a side ways smurk with him, however his looked like he knew something that I didn't. Questions began to fill my mind, but I pushed them out. Edd and Matt are your best friends, they would tell you if they were gay, even more so if they were gay together.
"Anyway, see ya Matt." Tord's voice snapped me out of my daydream. "C'on Tom, lets go get the things." I nodded, and started walking with him. We got to the main exit of the apartments and was hit with a brick wall of wind. The bitter weather felt like needles against my skin. I shiverd and carried on walking beside Tord.

We passed an allyway and I heard a familier irritated yell.
"Shut up. The guy was like the same size as me, with a robot arm! You go agsinst him when he was as annoyed as he was. All I did was what I normaly do!" I gripped Tords hand and hid next to him as we scurried past Jack's Ally.
"Is he normaly there?" Not wanting to say anything, out of fear of breaking down, I simply nodded. "Ok good to know."

We got to the shop and was engulfed in hot air. I let out a soft sigh as we made our way to the pain killers.

Matt's p.o.v (after talking Tom and Tord)

I stumbled into my apartment. Oh my god, what just happend? Tom not dumb I'll give him that. What if he had found out about me and Edd? But their is nothing to find out about... Right? I'm not daiting Edd, even if I wish I was. God, he's so perfect, even more perfect than me! He makes my day brighter just by laughing, he's so soft and kind, he welcomed Tord back, even after everything, he helped me get my memory back and is trying to stop Tom drinking, he's so selfless and happy and just so innosent and bubbly. (Writting about Edd had reminded me about someone.... cough, cough Theia3773 cough, cough...)

Tord's p.o.v

I had paid for Tom's meds and was walking back to our apartment. He was keeping very close to me and had his head bent low.
"Hay," I nudged him gently, "It's ok, I'm here,"
"Y-you sure?" I couldn't tell if he was stuttering, or shivering from the freezing wind.
"I'm sure," I smiled as much as I could without opening the cuts on my face.
"T-Thank you Tord, thank you for everything. For getting rid of Jack, for stopping my panic attack, for, for, for-" I could hear his voice getting wobbly.
"Shhhh, its alright." I pulled him into a tight hug and just stood their for about a minute: hugging Tom to my chest as the smaller male wept into my jumper. Wow, we always end up like this.

After a while it stated to rain lightly. "Tom, its raining." Toms grip on my hoodie loosened as he looked up into the sky, like he was checking if I was telling the truth. He stayed silent as I grabbed his hand and dragged him back to tge apartments. He was drenched, his black jeans clung tightly to his slender legs, his hoodie looked more oversized then it already did and his, normaly spiked hair was glued to his forhead. A small yawn escaped his lips as he dove into his hoodie pocket for something, tgen sighing after giving up on, what I could guess, was his flask.
"We left that inside remember," he nodded his head, still not saying anything, Is he ok? Why isn't he talking? Is it something I've done? He started walking towards our apartment, he gave a sideways look to Matt's house and a sad one to Edd's. He muttered something under his breath that I couldn't hear, before unlocking the door to our small house.

Tom's p.o.v

"I'm sorry Edd." I whisperd before letting Tord in. I stayed silent as I grabbed the pills from the bag containing the rest of our shopping: mostly food, a few cand of Cola for Edd, some 'non-acholic' beer (that Tord had told me to get) and a collection of bandages for Tords wounds, and my own.... It it comes to that.... I poured some water and took two pain killers.

I went to go find Tord, he was in our, I mean MY bedroom, he was sat on the bed, his elbows on his knees, his head in his hands, he looked like he was panicing, something I know way too much about. I know what its like to slip into a panic attack, to have your vision and hearing blurred, to only hear your thoughts, to have an unswallable lump in you throught, to have you chest so tight it might bust, to shake and mutter uncontrollibly, to feel yourself slipping away from life, to have people try and snap you out of it, yep. I know what a panic attack felt like.

I walked over to Tord and started running my hands through his hair. "Shhh, it's alright, Im here. It's ok, you'll be ok." Some how I managed to drag him out of his stait, because he launched and tackled me onto the bed.
"T-Tom, your alright."
"Y-yeah, you where having a panic attack and-"
"-oh god, I'm so sorry, its just you where silent and you started looking for your flask an-a-and I got worried-"
"Shhhh, It's ok, I'm sorry for scaring you and- OMG TORD ARE YOU CRYING?"
"I-It's-I'm fine. J-just why where you so quiet?" I watched as the tears began to vanish, however they still left marks on his cheeks. I never thought I would see Tord like this. So emotional. I sighed and began to speak.
"I was quiet because I felt bad, bad about drinking, bad about letting Jack in, bad about dragging you to the shops, bad about lying to Edd, lying to Matt, lying to you. I guess I just felt bad for existing." By this time I could feel hot tears rolling down my face. "Ha, look I'm crying now, pathetic I know."
I felt walm arm wrap around me,
"You don't have to feel bad about anything, your fine, not perfect.... but no one is. Your you, and that enough."
"T-Thanks Tord"
"Hay, it's late. Wanna go clean up and ask Edd and Matt round for dinner?"
"Sure.."
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A/n
remember this:
Never ask for too much be thankful for what youv'e got, because you never know when your going to loose it all, or when you life might come crashing around you. Even if it has nothing to do with people dying, worlds can still crumble at the seams.... Take it from me.

Happish news tho: Christmas is just round the corner..... yay......