Bed Partners

Fear

Qing's Tape 4, Side B

Dra.Yen: What are you most afraid of right now?

Qing: Oh, are we on the "let's analyze Qing's life" session right now?

Dra.Yen: You are the main reason why we are doing these therapy sessions.

Qing: Ouch. And here I thought you meet with me because you like me. How much do I pay you again?

Dra.Yen: Enough for me to pay another psychologist to give me trauma therapy. And to send my two children to an expensive private high school.

Qing: (laughing) I gave you trauma now?

Dra.Yen: You are not funny.

Qing: (chuckling) Dayu thought so too. I baffled him most of the time. Doing what I want. Treating him how I want to treat him. I am driving him insane. He tried avoiding me but I caught him fast before he can get away.

Dra.Yen: You just married your parents off and you and Dayu are already having issues?

Qing: It's fine now. I settled that and I will take one more step to get Dayu trapped to my side.

Dra.Yen: You are sure putting too much efforts for this guy. You do love him.

Qing: I do. If I don't, I don't think I can put up with all his drama. You should have warn me. Being with another guy is not easy.

Dra.Yen: Hey, I warned you. I said it will not be as easy as you think it is. But like always, you don't listen to me when I am cautioning you, you daft boy.

Qing: Well, it's over and done. A disaster was avoided. Dayu and I are okay again.

Dra.Yen: And your next move?

Qing: I will mix business with pleasure.

Dra.Yen: But you never mix business with pleasure. It's against your rules.

Qing: What can I do? I have to bend some of my own rules to have Dayu. It's okay...

Dra.Yen: (worried tone) Are you sure it's okay? Qing, you told me that you have those rules so you can stop yourself from thinking too much and drowning with your thoughts. Mixing business with pleasure is just asking for trouble.

Qing: But Dayu will get closer to me and it will tangle us together tighter. I have to do it to get him to be mine.

Dra.Yen: You are starting to sound obssess about him. Should I be worried?

Qing: What do you mean I am starting to sound obssess about him? I have been obssessed about him for quite sometime now, you mean you just caught up? Aren't you too slow?

Dra.Yen: Oh my...yeah, I see it now.

Qing: I fucked him in my sports car. You know how much I adore my sports car. And I let him into my condo, a lot of times now. He sleeps on my bed. Do you know anyone else I let sleep on my bed...?

Dra.Yen: No one.

Qing: Exactly. Dayu had all my attention for over three months now. I am beyond obssess about him. I told you. I love him.

Dra.Yen: Then why not tell it to Dayu and start having a serious committed relationship with him?

Qing: He thinks I am engaged to a woman. Dayu will not jump in my arms readily. Goodness, we are going in circles with this. I told you, if I jumped the gun too quickly, I can lose him. Losing Dayu is not an option right now.  Are you deliberately acting stupid to make me angry so you can say I have emotions now?