Bed Partners

Irritating

Qing's Tape 5, Side A

Dra.Yen: Why don't you want that woman to meet Dayu?

Qing: Because she is ugly. Dayu is beautiful. Every passing day, he grew more and more beautiful in my eyes. How can I let that woman's ugliness touch Dayu? That will be a crime. I should be sued if I let that happen. Do you know what Dayu did? He said I should stop addressing her as mother and just call her Mrs.Ho. I finally have a name for her without insulting other mothers. Isn't he amazing?

Dra.Yen: Yeah, sure. He is amazing. But what will you do about these lies and rumors she is spreading?

Qing: I will stop it, of course. But not in the way that Maman and Dayu will get involve.

Dra.Yen: I can see you have a plan already.

Qing: I always have a plan when it comes to that woman. I don't feel that much when it comes to her but what little I can feel for her can be said in one word. Irritating. She is irritating.

............................

(QING)

Dayu is irritated. And I knew why he is irritated and to who.

Me. He finds me irritating.

I find my biological mother irritating. So I know what Dayu is feeling. But I think I can understand now why that woman likes to irritate me and Baba. There is something satisfying in knowing that you can bother the person who is so adamant to ignore you.

Dayu would be happy to ignore me this weekend. Just go on his day without bothering about me. But I won't let him.

That's why instead of resting in my room this Friday afternoon like I planned to do, I opted to take a book and sat in the living room where Dayu sat on the carpeted floor to clean his nail. His nail cleaning kit and things are scattered on the center table.

I can see that he is very adept at cleaning nails. I look at my nails. I remembered two weeks ago, when I woke up, that when I look at my nails, it was properly manicured and cleanly maintained.

"Do you used to do that to my nails when you took care of me while I was in coma?" I asked Dayu.

Dayu didn't answer, instead he keeps on concentrating on his task. I cleared my throat and abandoned the book I am reading. "Will you really ignore me this weekend?" I asked him softly.

Still no answer. I sighed. He is worse than a sulking child when Dayu is in this mood. "Poor girl," I said before raising my book again.

"Are you calling me a girl?!" I look up to see Dayu glaring daggers at me. If his eyes can really shoot daggers, I will be dead now.

Pity, because he got such pretty eyes. Long lashed, rounded and expressive. It's so expressive I can clearly see his anger at me.

"No," I calmly close the book again. "I am talking about your girlfriend. Poor girl, if you are her boyfriend and you are like this when you are mad. As far as I know, girls doesn't like to be ignored." That is the reason why I don't like relationships. Girls are hassles to be with. If they are mad, they won't give you peace. If you are mad at them, they still won't give you peace.

That is why I am okay at bedding women but not forming a deeper connection with them. And with my condition, my emotions being like this, it's doubly hard to fall in love to a girl.

Dayu frowned. Anger lessening from his eyes. "I don't have a girlfriend. I am gay," he said before looking away from me.

I am surprised.