Country romance now completed

Chapter 18 part 2

Rejection hurts, like a lot, how do people even survive, knowing somebody doesn't even want them. How can I look at his face and know it's a constant reminder of how I can't him. How will I live, I will tell you the answer, I'm leaving, I'm going with my boyfriend and I'm going home.

We pretty much dragged my dad out of the house, dismissing his protest as though he had never put up a fight at all. I swear he is like a child, can I complain??? Austin didn't say much, as we sat side by side in the car, Jason and my dad not really noticing the silence that stretched on from the back seat.

Even just sitting next to him, it was as though my heart hadn't realized it had been rejected, as the excited feeling bubbled up in my stomach, he wasn't even right up next to me, however it still was alive and present. I wanted to say something, justify myself for what I had said, but I hadn't told him that I had liked him.

He had no idea what I had been getting at, and that was what hurt me the most. He had broken me without even knowing it.

Maybe he had known that I had feelings for him, and he didn't want to hear it, his heart wasn't mine, it belonged to that blonde girl he seamed to be so into.

"You okay," I turned at the sound of his voice, still swimming in my own thoughts. Am I okay, what a stupid question, you turned me down after I decided to trust somebody honestly, after like 10 years, I Took a leap at something I had never done before, I was honest with somebody. You have the decency to ask me if I am all right.

"I'm fine," I mumbled out, leaning against the window of the car, attempting to dull my heart down into nothing, yeah talk like that is going to do anything. I am going to continue to feel, because that is just how people are, they break and they break and they shatter until there is nothing left. Then they soak in their nothingness.

Music, it plays all over the place, different music for different cultures, I hadn't liked Country music when I first came, I still wasn't a fan, but I didn't despise it as much as I had before. Maybe it brought a sense of home to me, my father and what I used to know. It is funny how things can change, how and event can make something that used to be so exciting and enthusiastic turn to something dreadful and heartbreaking.

Tuning out Austins mindless chatter I concentrated on what was outside my window, feeling the hard glass against my forehead. Stupid stupid stupid, it hurst so bad, my heart, I can't explain it, it feels like someone has sucked all of the hope out of you, as though there is nothing and nobody left who could ever love you or be the same special person that they are, because there is nobody exactly the same who can make you feel alive as they did.

Nobody will bring the excitement like Austin did.

Nobody will bring the heartbreak like Austin did

He made my heart feel whole, that piece I had never noticed was gone, almost like something that you never knew you had a blast that you found and remembered how much you had missed it.

He amended what was broken something that I never had noticed I was living with out but now I thought I could never live without it.

So much more

I guess we are good being friends, it is better than nothing, and I don't want to ruin what friendship we have.

Putting up my sarcastic defense, I went back to my old miserable self. "You sure are chatty sheesh," I supplied him with one of my fake smiles, a smile that I. Knew didn't reach my eyes, maybe Brianna wasn't as tough as she thought she was. He didn't seem to notice my change in sarcasm, instead he started going on and on about a bunch of nonsense that I really didn't care about. So dumb, can't he shut up, please.