A day at King's Island

Part 26

Stevie stared at the three men as they stumbled through the exit.

"Wow! You managed to get out without dashing your brains all over the ride. I'm impressed." Stevie said, with an amused smile.

Her smile widened as she notice Lindsey bend over and began to heave.

"Do my eyes deceive me? It looks as though strong, manly Lindsey is about to vomit? Can it be even he has his limits?"

Lindsey looked at her.

"I'm not gonna vomit. I just need to take a breather and get my equilibrium back." He said.

"You mean you actually lost it? How can that be? You were spinning so slowly." Stevie said, snickering.

She looked over at Mick and John who were leaning up against a couple of trees.

"My, my, my...look at all the sickly green faces. Glad I'm not one of them." She said.

Lindsey looked around at Mick and John.

"Next roller coaster we come to...we tape her eyes open and throw her on it." He said.

"Aw, what's the matter, Buckingham? Hate being the one on the receiving end of the teasing for a change?" Stevie asked. "Afraid to admit that I was the smarter one when I decided not to spin around like I was trapped in a washing machine?"

"At least I had the guts to spin around like that..." Lindsey said.

"Yeah, and you're about to lose those guts on the pavement too."

"No, I'm not..." Lindsey said, leaning back up. "See, I'm a-okay!"

"I'll alert the media. I'm sure they'll be thrilled to know that." Stevie said.

She slapped her hands together.

"Well, I'm ready. How about you guys?"

She looked around at them.

"No? Yes? Give me an answer. Time's a-wasting!" she said, snapping her fingers.

"Remember, guys..." Lindsey said, looking at Mick and John. "The next roller coaster...she's going solo..."

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"Look, Lindsey..." Stevie suddenly cried out, as they neared the Eiffel Tower. "You know what those are over there? Those are called restrooms. Normal people often use them so they don't get poison ivy and bug bites all over their ass."

"Well, gee Steves, I guess some of us have to risk poison ivy and bug bites because we have full bladders...unlike those who choose to eat two bites of lettuce and half a carrot for lunch!"

"Aw, maybe you better learn not to eat some much then, my little hungry, hungry, hippo. Then you wouldn't feel compelled to drop a load every 2 feet." Stevie said, pinching his cheek.

"Now, if the gentlemen and the caveman will excuse me. I have to pee." She said, sweetly.

"Well...I'll alert the media for you." Lindsey said, with mock sweetness. "I can see it now. Stevie Nicks knows how to use a filthy, amusement park restroom; Film at 11."

Mick and John giggled.

"I better go too." Mick said, sobering up. "Who knows if we'll have to climb all the way up that."

"Yeah, good idea." John added, following him as he walked into the restroom.

Lindsey walked over to a bench across from the restrooms and sat down. After a moment, he saw Stevie emerge and walk towards him.

"Ah! I feel so much better!" Stevie said, standing over him and stretching. "And the best part was I could pee knowing I wasn't going to have the face the possibility that a security guard might come along and boot my ass out of the park for urinating all over the vegetation."

"You just don't know how to live dangerously anymore, Steves." Lindsey said.

"I wouldn't call peeing in the bushes living dangerously, Lindsey. I'd call it living stupidly."

"Yeah, well you'll be singing a different tune when you catch herpes from the dirty toilet seat."

"You better hope I don't catch it since you'll be the winning recipient of it!" Stevie said.

"Well, that'll be another thing we'll have to share then..." Lindsey said, grinning. "Our love, our music, our venereal diseases..."

"You guys have venereal diseases? When did that happen?"

Lindsey looked over as Mick and John walked up and stared at them.

"We don't. But miss civilized woman was boasting about using the filthy toilets in there and I warned her about catching herpes from it."

"OH...Phew...for a second there. I thought I came up on something you and Stevie had been keeping secret for years and I started thinking back and mentally checking back to the late 70's to see if I've had any genital warts or burning when I urinated."

Stevie's mouth flew open as Lindsey and John bent over laughing.

"Well, if that were true, we'd also have to go and inform...Don and Jimmy and Joe...and whoever else she's been with." He said, giggling.

"IF...that were true, I would have informed you and everyone else. I am a responsible woman!" Stevie said, folding her arms over her chest.

Lindsey looked at Mick.

"Responsible woman...1975 to 1994...care to comment?"

"Nope, I'm not even gonna touch this one." Mick said.

They giggled as Stevie rolled her eyes.

"Are we ready yet?" she said impatiently.

"I am...but are you sure you don't want to go back in and visit mister toilet bowl one more time? He may need a drink!"

Lindsey, John and Mick walked off laughing as Stevie sighed and followed behind them.

"You know, guys...I betcha Stevie would be a natural at doing those kinds of instructional films they show in schools." Lindsey said to Mick and John as they walked. "I could see her doing one entitled...The toilet bowl is your friend!"

"No, I'd do one entitled...How to silence Lindsey Buckingham...Part One...How to rip his voice box out of his throat without messing up your carpet."

"Part two..." Lindsey added, looking at Mick and John. "How to run like Hell after you've done it."

"Part three...How to grab a shovel and knock Lindsey out when he runs after you and part four...digging a grave and burying the annoyance...time saving tips so you can get dinner on the table for your family."

"Part four-B: How to rise from the grave, get your voice box back and shag Stevie Nicks when she's not looking." Lindsey said, giggling.

He looked back at Stevie.

"Any other parts to this film?" he asked her.

"No, that's the end of it..."

"Really? You mean I end up shagging you at the end of the film? Sweet!" Lindsey said.

"No, I mean that's the end of that topic...get on another." Stevie said.

"Oh, I see, well the topic I'll get on is...shagging Stevie Nicks. Tell me, Mick, how was it for..."

"Another topic!" Stevie yelled out as Lindsey, Mick and John laughed hysterically.