How to get тнroυgн тнe darĸ- When there isn't any light.

I didn't do it.

For the most part, I've stayed away from Harry... And the boys. I've been slacking off of my school work and I'm really enjoying school right now.

I mean... It's just.. Nice to get away from all the depression and crying and watching what you say because something might offend one of them and leave you apologizing for something not completely at your fault.

So I've done my homework and studied, and for five days, I only texted Harry a few times. But otherwise no contact with him.

As terrible as it sounds.. I can't be with him as much as I have been.

It's almost unbearable to see him like this constantly and I'm not exactly perfectly fine either. But lately it hadn't mattered what's going on with me... Not in any of our minds. Maybe Harry wishes it wouldn't be so directed at him. Maybe no one notices how dead inside I am seeing him so frickin hurt all the time. I hate this. I hate it. It all started out so simple... Just helping out a tiny bit.... But it's blossomed from so much bigger than just this.

Have you ever been dating a guy for a close to a month now, without really knowing if he hated seeing you or if he wanted you here with him every second of the day. I'm just so tired of not knowing. Sometimes I can tell they think of me as just a child. But if that's all I am then I don't want any part of any of this.

But... When Niall texts me asking if I want to come over for their practice... Just because they haven't seen me and they need someone to critique it.

I laugh and ask him if they're tired of me yet and he says "not yet" with a laughing emoji (😂).

I wonder why Harry didn't ask me but I still move myself robotically that Friday evening but apparently I have nothing better to do.

My friend Dylan stops me in the hall. He's walking with Emma.

"Where are you going!?" He says smiling.

"Harry's house" I say rolling my eyes but smirking.

"No your not"

I smile,

"What?".

"Your coming with us... We're going to a bar and can't go without you.. I haven't seen you drunk yet and it's on my bucket list. You seem like the fighter type... You throw punches well?" He laughs.

"Oh c'mon Brooke don't be so infatuated with those damn guys... What about Dylan he's a hottie right?"

Dylan nods his head frantically. I start walking away with my drawstring bag thrown over my shoulder and the other string and some of the bag hanging at my waist.

"Don't flatter yourself Dylan.. And I can't.......... Right now."

They smirk.

"What time are you going?"

"Eight!" Emma announces proudly.

"Alright Em... I'll be there" I say, glancing at my phone and seeing the time is exactly 6:03.

"YAYY" she shrieks.

"Cool... Yeah I'll see ya there" Dylan says cooly.

"Your not hipster" I yell back as I leave and start walking out on the damp sidewalk.

In my bag I've got my phone charger, my wallet, a water bottle I hadn't opened yet, my hairbrush, my makeup bag and my earphones.

Necessities.

"I'll only go for a little while... Then.. It's my turn to have fun" I think, as I smile and start my car up.

☆☆☆☆