How to get тнroυgн тнe darĸ- When there isn't any light.

Texting in class while he's on the road.

Texting in class while he's on the road

Brooke's pov🌌
"Yeah, no I know it'd be great but Liam I just can't leave right now. I've been slacking off. I'll call you later, bye"
I dig through my clothes drawers, knowing whatever I wear won't be good enough anyway.
'Its okay' I remind myself, 'Harry is the only one whose opinions I care about anyway'. I smile, thinking of that smile that is literally my whole world.
I throw on a black skater skirt with a sweater overtop of it. I grab a clip and pin a pinch of my hair on both sides back together, frowning at the bags under my eyes despite my obvious attempt at hiding it in an excessive amount of coverup and mascara to furthermore hide them.
I slip on my brown boots and think of harry, probably somewhere stumbling around laughing, completely sober.
God I miss him.
I don't know what happened but he left for tour and apparently calling me is tedious to him now.
I just wanna know if he's okay.
I slip off to my first class of the day regretting over-sleeping and missing breakfast. I cradle my binder, pencil case and my phone as I wander off to organic chemistry and desperately wishing I had a banana or something to fill my empty stomach. Is it to much to ask for a friggin glass of juice?
Professor Albright, a wonderful, easy going woman with short medium toned hair, greets me as I walk in and announces class has started as a few others and I begin finding seats.
She begins discussing transition metals, from last week, and asks questions about Zinc and Palladium. I answer a question quickly but correctly and she gives me a reassuring nod.
I shiver. It is now November and almost snowing. I flip my pencil back and forth in my hand, losing focus already in her lecture and wondering what the boys are doing at that very moment.
I'm extremely tired lately: working late nights and procrastinating on projects, missing breakfast mostly, and overall forgetting to be a uptight person who cares a lot more than one should.
I miss him so fucking much.
You probably can't even imagine how much it hurts to see the only one who keeps you strong, weak, no matter how hard you try to do what he did for you, for him. If that makes any sense.
He uses knives.
It's still not registering as reality, not now and not ever.
Okay I'm not perfectly happy with me but I guess seeing Harry's mood swings makes everything else vanish.
He's not always miserable. Nobody ever really is.
Sometimes he's perfectly and unrealistically happy and that makes me feel like I finally did something right. But I didn't, not really. He still occasionally becomes depressed and filled with self hatred.
I snicker at the thoughts in my head. Instead of chemistry I'm lost in my thoughts that I shouldn't even be having in the first place.
I just can't be normal. Thankfully. :)
"Brooke?"
"Okay um, I believe lanthanides were included".
"If we were on that question yes that would be correct, you're two above us. Straighten up, miss" she says, nodding slightly as we make eye contact. I sigh. Why must she never address any of us by our names during class. I know she knows my name.
"If you wanna study after classes, we could go get pizza with the gang if you want" Lauren, my chemistry class friend texts me.
We talk and text sometimes, but we aren't exactly good friends. She's nice and all I guess neither of us ever put in the time to hang out or set up a party date or whatever you do when you start friendships.
We're both not amazing but she's really pretty and funny, and I don't know, I definitely wouldn't categorize myself as disgusting.
I'm dating harry effing styles I mean.. I can't be doing bad. It's not possible.
I laugh at her use of the word "gang" instead of clique or just plain out "group of friends".
I text back, "yeah maybe. I know how to do this though I just lost focus lately 😄" I press send.
Notes flash up on the board as the Elmo turns on. I drop my phone in my lap and copy down notes, not expecting Lauren to reply until she finishes taking notes.
I feel my phone silently vibrate and I surprisingly got a text, but even more surprisingly not from Lauren.
Who would text me when they know I'm in class. You'd have to be in a frickin different time zone to-
Harry.
That's who texted me, I realize, glancing down at the name on my lockscreen.
I finish up what notes I had gathered and answers I knew I didn't have to check the board to know was right.
"Hey" the text simply says.
"Hey babe, whaddya need, I'm in class" I reply.
"I was just wondering if you ever decided if you were coming or not"
I don't have to hide my phone, that would be childish in college; I'm paying anyways. But I do like the professors to like me and know they have my full intention.
'Not today' my mind says.
I smile, thinking of a million different things and text back Harry.
"Liam told you."
"Yeah I'm sorry I don't wanna be the bitch that blows him in but..."
"You're not a bitch😄😂😙, I just kind of assumed. Anyway idk yet.." I say, rolling my eyes and already feeling guilty for almost no reason and at the same time for every reason.
"You don't have to come but you could if you still wanted."
"My tickets would be reserved?" I ask, not answering him.
"Along with the lads and I" he texts back.
I really don't wanna miss any class. It'd probably be a week and I've already not exactly done my best in all my classes. But it's Harry...
"How are you❤️" I text back, dying to hear his voice and knowing if I went I would get my wish and more.
He knows what my question meant, too.
It takes him a minute after he's read it to reply, but he answers.
"Better😊".
"You promise?" I text, pausing to take more notes.
"What was after the two compounds?" I ask the guy sitting next to me. I recognize him to be Dan, the gayest, funniest guy you'll ever meet. We chat sometimes.
"The properties"
"Qualities and quantitative" I murmur, adding in a "thanks" at the end.
"Anything for my biscuit" he says.
I stifle a laugh, recognizing my nickname that he made up two years ago. That seems like forever ago.
"I promise🙌"
"I gotta go I actually have to pay attention for once. Call me laterr! I love you💕"
I type, taking the time to write out I love you instead of "ily".
"You never answered my questionnn, and I love you too Brooke" he says, adding my name in.
It gives me butterflies just reading his texts because in my head I read them in his voice unconsciously.
"Idk yet, I'll text you. Thank liam for me for ruining the surprise🎉😕😂🙊"
"Alright. I'll see you soon" he says, immediately assuming, maybe even knowing I'll give in and come.
"Why don't you ever text 'bye' back?" I text my final reply back.
I set my phone back on my thigh and catch myself up with what I tuned out for the past five minutes of texting Harry.
My phone notifies me that I have a text, I ignore it, finally getting back into class and knowing what they're talking about and which section we're on.
"Your materials test is coming up, and you all are getting A+'s, correct?"
"Yes professor Albright" a few of us answer in unison, the others nodding or not bothering to reply at all.
"You have the rest of class to work" she tells us; which means I can read what harry wrote.
"You told me if I ever said goodbye that you would immediately say goodbye to the world as well. I don't want you to leave, and I guess I don't wanna leave either" he texts back.
I screenshot and bite my lip.
I told him that the day after he confessed his love to me over a phone call, aka the absolutely greatest day of my life that's been permanently burned into my brain and I'm honestly still way too thrilled about that. ☻
I don't answer, not wanting or having to say anything else.
Well now I have to go see him, I smirk at the thought of my professors "disappointed glares" and sighs. I'm just having way to much fun with this.