Recovery {wRoNg sequel}

17

"I'm sorry for what I did with mike, you know the whole jealousy thing." I said to Ethan once we had laid down again in each others arms. His heart beat had slowed down now and I was tracing his warm hands with my cold fingertips.

"It's like I got carried away, you know. I was just tryna get your attention and Mike has been my closest friends apart from Sandra since jersey. This is gonna sound weird , but he reminded me of you, his humour and the way he understood me." I told him.

"It's okay, I had no right to be jealous you weren't even mine."

"So, I'm yours now?" I raised my eyebrow.

"If you want to be." He said and I replied with a hum.

"I like the sound of that." I smirked to myself.

You shouldn't.

We linked out hands again and entwined our fingers. It was like our thing that we did. We didn't give kisses, well not as much. We would entwine our fingers and it made me feel secure. Safe.

__________________

"How dare you wear this skirt!" My mother began to yell in our language. She tossed it at my and it landed on my face. Before I could peel it off, I was struck in the face by what I assumed was her hand.

I stumbled back and sat on my bed holding my face in pain, trying my hardest not to let out a noise or cry.

"You want to walk around like those girls huh? The ones that stay out all night and hang around with boys. You want to be a slut like them? Ya Allah!" She spat in my face.

I was still clutching my nose when she grabbed a black trash bag and pulled all the clothes from my closet. She began to pick out my skirts, which might I add she bought for me, and stuff them into the bag.

"You want these skirts that stick on your ass and show off how you look! You want all the boys to stare at your! You might as well walk around naked." She looked at me and approached me.  "Go! Walk around with no hijab!" She tugged at my hijab and pulled it from the loss strand almost strangling me.

She stopped when she noticed I wasn't looking at her or listening, but I was. She then grabbed and pinched my cheeks so hard, digging her nails in.

"If I ever, huh!" She yelled making sure I was listening and I nodded. "If I ever catch you wearing this again, you'll have to find another house to live in."

She let go and I fell back onto my bed. Holding my cheek and my aching nose and watched her silently as she continued to collect my clothes. I was just thankful this wasn't the worst of the worst.

I awoke to the sound of Grayson's voice echoing down the halls.

"Let me cook! Get out!" He yelled. His voice frightened me at first because it was so deep, but then I soon realised it was just Grayson.

I shuffled and scratched my head, confused as to where I was. Then it hit me that I was still at their house. I noticed that my headscarf had slipped down to my neck and my hair was out. Frantically I checked if Ethan was still there, but thankfully he wasn't. Did he just wake up? Did he spend the whole night in this room with me?

I climbed out of the bed and as I arose a tear ran down my face. I didn't know I was crying in my sleep because I hadn't done it in such a long time. I guess the talk we had about it made me remember and have such vivid memories about it.

the large sweat pants slip down and were slipping down my waist so I tighten the string to hold it in place. I then adjusted my hijab and saw that there was a toothbrush still in its packet from when Ethan handed me the clothes last night.

I wondered into one of their bathrooms and observed my face. My face was dull and there was dark circles under my eyes, way too dark to be normal. I looked at the nail mark on the side of my cheek and sighed because it was still there. When Sandra asked I remember telling her I had accidentally scratched myself with a hijab pin. I ran my finger under my eye and realised it was eyeliner and cleaned it up. I stared longer at my face and smiled to myself thinking about last night. After brushing my teeth, I walked out down the hall into the kitchen area.

"Morning sleeping beauty." Grayson said. He was shirtless and flipping what looked like soggy pancakes on a frying pan. He was much more muscular than Ethan and more tanned than him.

"Put that away." I said covering my eyes dramatically and laughing.

I caught sight of Ethan sat on the couch with only a tank top and boxers on.

"Is it a thing to dress less in the morning because if it is, I'm sad I can't join." I said sitting beside him and he chuckled.

"Guess we're just used to it being just us." He replied stretching his arm so it was behind me. He then unexpectedly pulled me close and kissed the top of my head, a light blush appearing on my face. I saw Grayson watch us from the kitchen and smile to himself turning away.

My chest felt like it was going to explode and I thought I might melt in his arms. The way he made me feel was unexplable and I'd never felt it with anyone before. I just knew I never wanted to leave his side, for this feeling never to die.

I also knew that this wasn't right. the feeling was always there, but I would subdue it and force it down like vile medicine. That constant shame and guilt was here, However it was lighter than it used to be. Before I would make dua and repent for even touching him or doing things I shouldn't be doing religiously. Now I was good at ignoring the feeling and just letting it happen. I was confused and now that I was away from my mother, away from the negativity it gave me time to think about myself, to enjoy what makes me happy even though it wrong. I guess time really does change people.

"What are you making?" I asked Grayson who was still focused on flipping what I thought were pancakes.

"Banana pancakes." He smirked and lifted the pan and showed me, only for the so called pancake to slid off and land on the floor.

Ethan and I erupted into a laughing fit as Grayson tried to hide his as he picked up the fallen pancake.

"It's not funny." He pretended to be angry. "One day I'll be the one laughing when I'm a master chef and you guys can't even make ice."

"Okay Grayson." Ethan said rolling his eyes still chuckling.

My phone vibrated my left hip as it was in the pocket of my sweats and i pulled it out breaking Ethan's grip. It was Mike so I smiled and answered quickly.

"Mike!" I almost yelled. "Where the fuck have you been?"

"I've just bee- yeah I'm okay." He said. Something didn't sound right.

"Are you okay?" I asked even though he'd just answered that. Ethan raised his eyebrow and looked at me.

"I'm fine just been busy with college bullshit. What about you?" I chose to believe him for now.

"I uh-" I looked at Ethan. "I'm with Ethan and Grayson right now." I told him, I had no reason to lie.

"Oh, I guess I'll let you guys have your fun then." I could almost see him smirking across the other line.

"Wait Mike." I told him and quickly put him on hold.

"Guys is it okay if Mike comes over. I haven't seen him for a long time and I want you guys to get to know him better."

"Yeah of course, you didn't even have to ask." Grayson said and I grinned happily.

"Mike, can you come over. I'll text you the address just bring your ass here please."

"You sure I won't be disturbing."

"I'm positive."

"Okay, ill call you when I get here, love you."

"Love you too, big head." Yes I loved him. He was my best friend and we'd been through a lot together.

"So, how did you and Mike meet?" Ethan asked. I leaned back on the couch and sighed. I detected a bit of jealousy in the question.