Finding Myself

chapter 18

I felt it. I could feel the life drain out of me. I could hear screaming and shouting. My neck felt as though it had been ripped open. My body was heavy and I could feel my consciousness slipping away. 

Then I jolted awake. The queen was finally awake. I got up petrified. I had seen my daughter, who was slowly dying. I lost her once I wasn’t about to lose her again. I jumped on the floor and cursed when my legs were stiff and I fell to the ground, my hands outstretched to take the impact.

I felt immensely rigid and decided that perhaps yelling would help. However when I started yelling my voice defied me. It was only but a mere whisper. I licked my dry crap licks that haven’t been used in so long and I crawled, using my hands as means to heave myself towards the door.

What finally seemed like ages I reached the door. Since I was lying on my stomach I was quite a distance away from the doorknob. I couldn’t stand or even prop myself up, because of my legs. It was like having jetlag, except on a much larger scale. 

I forced my feeble hands to start knocking on the door. The noises it made weren’t as nearly loud enough as I wanted, but I hoped they would be heard. 

Five minutes later, after losing all hope the door opened and in peered a servant girl. She shrieked when she saw me and ran away.

“Wait,” I tried to communicate with her. It was useless. Then I heard heavy footfalls nearing. They slowed down when they got close to the door though. 

One of the brave soldiers slowly turned his head and glanced in my direction. His eyes went wide and he yelled at the top of his lungs, “The queen is awake! Tell the king!”

“Wat-,” I tried saying.

The guard, and my savior, bent down where his ear was close to my mouth.

“Water,” I croaked out.

“Water,” he commanded. I heard running and sighed in relief. He picked me up and gently laid me on the bed. He grabbed both my legs and began stretching them. My legs hurt at first but then I could feel them becoming stronger and the numbing feeling was vanishing.

Then moments after I could feel the cool liquid on my lips and I spent no time draining it down. I drank three glasses straight until I no longer felt parched.

“My queen,” cooed my husband.

‘My king,” I said with tears in my eyes. For years I have heard that voice by my bedside table replaying all our precious memories. It touched my heart that even though I was in a frozen-like state he still had the love to stand by me made me feel elated. But now was not a time to revel in the moment.

“Honey I simply cannot express how grateful I’ am to see you, I really am but there are more pressing matters at hand,” I said urgently.

“Like what?” he asked me with tears in his eyes.

“The fact that our daughter is currently dying,” I said. There were various intakes of breath and for a moment it seemed as though the world had frozen. 

“Darling, she’s dead as she has been for many many years,” said the king tears freely flowing down his aged face. 

“That’s what woke me up. I had a vision of her and if we don’t get to her now she will die and we’ll lose her all over again,” I said in my most serious tone. I heard the guards shift uncomfortably but right now my gaze was willing the king to listen and help me.

“Are you certain?” he asked me with a hint of skepticism. I could see perfectly clear as to why he didn’t believe me. Our daughter was proclaimed dead and I had just woken up from a deep slumber, oblivious to the outside world. How would I know that the daughter I thought I lost was still alive?