Can't Remember Why

Suicidal Planning

Hindi ako makapaniwala sa nakikita ko.

Siya ba talaga? O baka naman I'm mistaken?

"W-what are you doing here?" Marahan kong sinabi na tila gulat na gulat.

Gulat ka naman talaga.

"I just came to visit." Sumilip siya sa paligid at kumunot ang noo niya. "Where are they?"

I don't know pero I'm seeing disappointment sa likod ng mga mata niya. And I also think she has plans.

"They're out kila Mick. You don't know him."

She shot an eyebrow towards the ceiling. "I know..."

"You know..." I said, questioning her next sentence.

"Nothing... I brought a cake." Tinaas niya ang hawak na box ng cake. Ang kinatatakutan kong hawakang muli. O kaya naman tignan. O di kaya'y matikman.

"Do you work there?" I started to get curious. And I pointed the logo on her polo shirt. Naging mailap bigla ang mga mata niya at kasama no'n ay ang pag-slump ng kanyang mga balikat.

"I got turned in last week."

I quickly reached for the cake at nilapag ko iyon sa lamesa. Habang papalakad ako pabalik, nakita ko si Abi nakaupo sa sofa... nakapangalumbaba at kinukusot ang mga mata.

Umiiyak ba siya?

"Hey." I rubbed her back. She looked at me with a pained expression. Knowing her for even just a short time, she has a strong personality but this? Mukha na siyang namatayan.

"Den. I caused this..." She started breathing heavily.

My heart pumped faster. Ano naman kaya ang maaaring inumpisahan niya?

Huwag niyang sasabihin na related si Mick. O kaya naman ang mga magulang niya. O kaya nama'y si Jon.

O di kaya'y si Junne at Hetti.

At nakuha ko pang isingit iyon? Heh.

"You caused what?"

"This."

She stomped her way towards the table and out the window the cake goes.

"Hey!" I pretended to be a little bit shocked about what she did pero aba, Lazaro 'to. But to be brutally honest, I don't care about the stupid cake.

Of course, I have my own tactics.

"Listen to me. We don't have much time." She stated and there she goes dashing around the sofa thinking about something.

"What's happening?" I followed her around trying to stop her from dropping off footprints all over the area.

"Myco is happening, Den."

Hearing that name, my ears get numb and so do all my body parts.

I fell on my knees. Contemplating the words "Myco is happening, Den."

What could be the meaning of those extreme words that had an extreme effect on me?

"What do you mean?" Ayun, natuto ulit akong magsalita matapos maging manhid ng katawan ko.

"I'm really sorry. Pero..."

She started explaining to me what was supposed to ruin me but we came up with a goddamn plan.

Si Myco ang nagpadala noong pastry pero dumaan muna iyon kay Abi. Inutusan siya nitong lagyan ng lason ang isa sa mga slices nito. Ang tanga naman niya, ano? Hindi nalang nilahat para ma-wipe out na ang mga magagandang nilalang.