IRREVERSIBLE

CHAPTER 8

Writings on the wall- Sam Smith

"Scarlett, where are you?" Alex asks stepping out of our little tent.
"Shit, it's Alex, get off of me!" I say trying to wiggle out of Justine's strong hold. "Let go of me Justine!", I whisper harshly. He looks at me with wounded eyes but complies taking a few step back. I straighten my just fucked hair thinking of all the stories I could come up with.

"Over here!" I yell my eyes roaming over Justine's gorgeous physique. Damn! He's body is so perfectly toned  it should be illegal. He gives me a precise look and I can't help but muse, We are the ones cheating  yet he gets upset? Reality finally dawns in. What have I done. Alex would be so upset and Jessica too. This is insane no-one must find out, absolutely no one.

I walk away from justine feeling so ashamed. He grabs my arm but I pull away quickly.
"What are you doing outside?" Alex asks approaching me, his eyes full of concern making my heart sink with guilt.
"I needed to use the toilet, when this bum popped out of nowhere and scared me!" I lie faking annoyance. Justine coughs behind me. "Seriously Alex, you gotta make him stop I almost had a heart attack!"

"What the hell man and what are you doing outside, don't you have a girl to keep warm?" Alex to my rescue...go figure.

"You know what, don't mind him. Am sure he suffers from somnambulism or something." I have to get Alex out of here before justine says something that will contradict me.

"I needed some fresh air plus it's not my fault she's always so jumpy." He shrugs nonchalantly and walks back to his tent. Smooth

"Are you ok?" Alex asks and i nod.
Sleep eludes me all night. I keep thinking of Justine's kiss and how he aroused feelings in me  I never knew existed. Now I know why Jessica acts like a smitten kitten all the time. I pray to God justine never mentions anything about this to her, she will never forgive me. Oh justine what have you done to me.

We packed up and left the next morning. I couldn't bring myself to look at Jessica because of guilt and couldn't look at Justine because of shame. I just needed to get away from them, far far away. Seriously what's wrong me? It's not like I slept with the guy.

"Where are you coming from!" My mother so lovingly ushered me in our home.
"I was at a sleep over at Jessica's" I say heading for the kitchen. "What's for breakfast Maria am hungry!" I say shuffling the fridge. I feel my mum's gaze digging into me.

"You know, you can whore all over the neighborhood for all I care but keep this in mind, if you dare do anything that will smear my reputation  I will not hesitate to do away with you. Oh and make sure you get an A in your final exams because Lizzy Amor does not give birth to douche heads." She concludes her little speech, picks her purse and sasheys her way out.

What did she mean by doing away with me? I hope it doesn't involve disowning me or worse killing me. I don't think I'd miss her if she disowned me,but I'll miss this lifestyle. Goodness I better behave then. How can she ask me of an A when she knows am a grade C student.  This means I have to get close to candy again. I just hope she still has room in her pathetic little heart for me.

I tried to avoid spending time with Jessica and Amanda the whole weekend. I even tried to get justine out of my system too but to no avail. This is pure bullshit, just a few days ago I hated him and now my heart skips every time I think of him. Why can't I like alex that way. Things would be so simple.

The following week I dedicated my time to study with candy. Partly to improve my grades and partly to avoid Jessica which was proving to be difficult. So many times I find myself scribbling Justine's name on my book or hand. Just one kiss has turned me into his slave and it make me sick.  Why Oh why did I have to get swept off my feet by that pauper.