Marlboro Lights (Larina) Marina and The Diamonds and Lana Del Rey

Promise

My heart melts. I feel my bones turn to rubber and my face get hot. No one has ever be so sure of me like this. No one has been so dedicated to my well being....or to me so purely. In a way where I know this person is not in it for physical attraction, they are in it for who I really am, not some toy to play with.

"Marina I...I..I don't know what to say. How can you be so sure?" I ask in awe.

"I've never been so sure of anything in a really long time, Lana. I've been alone and unsure for so long, and now, I know this is what I'm supposed to do." She took her hand in mine, squeezing tightly.

"What do you mean alone?" I ask perplexed.

*MARINAS POV*

"I've just been really lonely all my life." I look down. Not wanting to go back to those feelings.

Lana looks at me perplexed. "But what do you mean lonely. Like what made you lonely?"

"I don't think you'd wanna hear all about that..." I mutter.

"Of course Marina, if you're gonna be here for me I wanna be there for you." She smiles and my heart flutters.

She cares.

"Okay... Well, my family is from Wales-"

"That explains the accent." Lana laughs.

"Yes, that explains the accent." I giggle. "My mom is Welsh and my father is Greek. I have a younger sister also. My sister, father, and I have always been really close. However, my mother was very troubled. After my father lost his job he took a job working on a boat. Catching fish and such to sell at the markets. For some reason I never understood why my mother was angry at him after this. She drank and continuously yelled at my sister and I. Blaming us for reasons unknown. She never supported me in my dance or music. She would always come in my room to break my things and say things like "you're worthless Marina. All these little games you play with us" or "you and all your singing and dancing. You know it's all full of shit." My sister always always supported me but she would hide away at friends houses..." Lana held my hand tight, urging me to go on "...my father loved it though. He loved my singing especially. He would come to all my recitals when he could. But he was always away working to provide for us. He would always promise to take me away. Just me and him, so that we wouldn't have to suffer from all the negative things.....then one day we did. One morning after being away for a week he came to my room. He told me to be quiet while he packed my things. It was my 14th birthday, the best birthday I've ever had. Then we went on his boat and left. We were at sea for a couple months then landed here. He built our house shop and we lived here happily. He promised that he would always be there for me. That he would support me with every decision that I made. We were so happy...."

I went on and told her about Ian. Her expressions ranged from anger to sadness throughout my story. Seeing her care so much made the darkness of those memories turn to light. It made the memories finally at rest in the past instead of clouding my thoughts everyday.

Lana lips pressed together and her eyebrows furrowed in deep thought. She seemed to go over every detail in her head. "What happened to your father?"

My lip quivers, trying to let all my emotions out. "I don't know. He just never came back. So I had to take over the shop completely. It felt like he broke his promise. He stopped being there. He left. Now I had no one. "

"You miss him don't you..." Lana whispers.

I knew if I opened my mouth to speak I would let it all out, so I just squeezed her hand in response.

"I promise I'll be there, Marina." She says.

I look up ate her, tears brimming my eyes. "Thank you."

The emptiness I felt started to become full again.

~

"Lana I think Chris will be returning soon" I glance at the clock. 8:16 PM.

Lana's bottom lip puffs out like a child. "I don't want you to go."

My heart flutters at her words. "I know but I know how Christopher will be if he knew I was here. Ill see you tomorrow though. I promise."

I stand to leave but Lana catches me before my hand reaches the door knob. Her arms wrap around my body and she squeezes me tight.

"Thank you Marina. I really don't know what to say." She mumbles against my shoulder.

I hug her back, wrapping my arms around her neck. "You don't have to say anything."