Marlboro Lights (Larina) Marina and The Diamonds and Lana Del Rey

Endure

ring ring ring

I hear the phone ring through the haze of my unconsciousness.

ring ring ring

Marina violently nudges me to answer my phone. I untangle myself from her and roll over to reach my night stand. 

ring ring ring

I skim my hand across the nightstand causing my phone to crash to the floor.

"What the hell, Lana." I hear marina mumble and roll over covering her head with a pillow. 

Ugh fuck me. I roll of off the bed and pick up my phone.

"Hello?"

"Good evening Ma'am am I speaking to Ms Del Rey?" I frown at the clock seeing that its 4 AM but decide not to address it like the last time. Though I do recognize the voice to be Officer Hudson from the NYPD. He's dealing with Chris's case.

"Yes this is her. Is this Officer Hudson?" I confirm.

"Yes Ma'am I'm calling to update you on your boyf- um Christopher." I sigh in annoyance at his mistake but am glad that he remembers this from our last conversation. 

"Whats going on with him?" I question, cutting to the chase.

"He had his trial and the judge ruled that he will be serving 3 years in prison with bail for domestic violence and attempted rape."

'WHAT?!" Marina jolts up at my sudden outburst. I take a deep breath. "How the fuck? He has raped me countless times how the fuck is it attempted? What is wrong with our justice system?!?"

"I ask this question everyday given the recent events.." Officer Hudson mumbles over the line.

I sigh. Marina wiggles over to lay her head on my shoulder, calming me down. "Can you please put in a request for a permanant restraining order,  I never want to see that pig again in my life."

"Of course Ms Del Rey." 

"Thank you have a good night." I immediately hang up the phone not waiting for a response.

I turn to Marina. "He's only getting three years. Three fucking years and they are only charging him with domestic violence and ATTEMPTED rape with bail." My voice quivers at the thought of him being released early from jail. 

"I know its fucked up babe, but just remember that he is a world away from us. You are safe here with me." Marina's tired voice carries through the darkness. I'm glad she can not see the tears brimming at my eyes. 

I feel her hands push my shoulders back and I let them guide my body back into bed where Marina throws her leg over my waist and rests her head on my chest. I kiss the top of her head and settle my own into my pillow.

I close my eyes and try to imagine a world without Chris or Ian, without misery or pain. But I can't. It's just not that simple. However, the misery and pain is what brought us together. I'll endure it a thousand times for Marina. 

"Marina" I whisper

"Hmm?" She whispers back in her tired state

"Marina, I love you so much" I say aloud. I can feel her look up at me from my chest. I try to squint to see her face but I can not make out anything. Her weight shifts and suddenly I feel her breath on my lips. 

"I love you" She breaths.

I find her face using my hand and pull it into mine.

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*AUTHOR'S NOTE*

hello beautiful readers. i have been AWOL but i have not forgotten about the story. college is fucking hard and i have realized that it isnt all cracked up to be and i kinda wanna jump off a cliff right now. however this coming up week is finals week and after that i have a month long break which is gonna be filled with writing and updating Marlboro Lights. i read all of your beatuiful comments and it motivates me to keep going and coming up with new ideas. and i am VERY VERY aware that this is a short update. the story is gonna be picking up soon so brace yourselves. 

thank you guys so much and i love you all

shout out to all the pears